Yo Mama is so white, people call her caucasian.

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What do you do if you see an alien landing? This depends entirely on the circumstances under which the landing takes place. It also depends on the observed nature of the alien,but given the high unlikelihood of this occurrence, one may be safe in the knowledge that he or she will never have to deal with such a mental state of stress.

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What did the Bishop say to the pebble? Wash my car

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What's more addicting than a good book? Meth

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Q. What did the pedophile get when he went to jail? A. Exactly what he wanted.

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What did the sick kid say to Make a Wish foundation? To get better

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Why did the first monkey fall out of the tree? Because he was DEAD! But why did the second monkey fall out of the tree? Because he was stapled to the first monkey... But then why did the third monkey fall out of the tree? P-p-p-p-eer pressure

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What's the best part of a family reunion? The sodomy.

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never bring a knife to a gun fight. bring a sword.

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A horse walks into a barn.

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What did George Washington say to his men before they crossed the Delaware River? Men, to the boats.

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A wanted man walks into a bar. The police come and take him to jail.

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Roses are red, Violets are blue, Sugar is sweet, Death is inevitable.

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Knock Knock Who's There? It's Me. Oh, OK. Come On In.

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Why did the chicken get taken into the kitchen? If u dont get this you need to go b ack to school

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Why was the boy seeing stars? It was night time.

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Have you seen Stevie Wonders new house? Neither has he.

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If I have 12 backpacks and Jimmy has 91 pancakes, then how many marshmallows can cover the roof of this building? Purple. Because Aliens don't wear hats.

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what did the homeless man get for Christmas? RAPED.

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Knock Knock Who's there? Cindy Cindy who? Cindy your neighbor. I was wondering if I could borrow some milk, I ran out.

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Why was a small girl found dead in the town park? Because Sallie was a bitch and deserved to die.

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What's the difference between a Jew and a pizza? Nothing, we eat pizza and we respect Jews.

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Your mom is so fat that she has type 2 diabetes.

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Why did the pumpkin stop using the jack hammer? Pumpkins cannot use power tools since they are nothing but orange gourds. But, [for sport] say this ‘pumpkin’ was incarnate; one could assume he was done with his demolition work. He then would return the portable drill to the rental facility and get his deposit back.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

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