If Chuck Norris has $5 and you have $5 then all together you have $10. It was announced that the obverse portrait of Alexander Hamiliton would be replaced by the portrait of an undecided woman, starting in the year 2020. If you wait long enough, you can exchange the $10 for the new $10 bill.

Why couldn't Helen Keller drive? Because she couldn't afford one.

A bar walks into a man. The drink orders a bartender. And then the money walks home. End The.

A human walked into a bar, The bartender quacked, "quack quack quack" The human wondered why all the patrons and the bartender were ducks, so he left the bar, before his head spontaneously exploded.

A man walks into his house only to find someone in the livingroom touching the stereo. He then goes up to his wife, and kisses her.

I am iron man 24 flavors in my van i am the icecream man i have met jackie chan

i have two hands.

What squirts out of your butt and runs down your leg? Bloody diarrhea.

What did the little boy with no arms get for cristmas? A football.

What's the difference between a duck?

knock knock. whos there? the IRS you have recently filed for bankruptcy and we are repossessing your house.

What's worse than finding a worm in your apple? Being held for random.

why did the man throw his clock out of he window? he was mentally insane.

What did the skinny man say to the fat woman. That sucks.

What is funnier than one dead baby? Two dead Babies

awkies when u see danni white fingering jacob :0;0;0;0, and jamie fingering himself..............

So a man walks into a bar and he says "Can i have two beers?" The bartender says "Sure, Budweiser or Heineken?" The man responds "Uhmm... which one do you prefer?" The bartender says "Heineken."

A man is walking down the street when he stumbles upon a school, every school in the area had an American flag outside it, so he sees the flag and atop this flag a man is sitting and he doesn’t look comfortable. Next to the flag pole is a chair with a flag attached to it and the wind is as strong low down. So he looks at the man and says "Sir I think you may be using those wrong." The man on the flagpole says "why?" So he says well this chair is flat and made for sitting and this flag pole has a draw string for the flag. The man atop the flag pole says "I'm sure good will come of this…..im sure." the man says "What good could possibly come of this!" and the man on top of the flag pole looks at him and says "Later……………..you can tell this story to your friends and disappoint them when they find out theirs no punchline."

When I'm through with you... They will never find your body... And even if they did... All they find would be teeth!!!

why did timmy die he was shot in the head by terrorists

Q: whats worse that sucking at piano A: the world blowing up

Why did little Billy fall of his bike? anwser: because a refridgator hit him.

What did a policeman say to his belly? Nothing. Because he knows his belly is incapable of speech.

Why is the post under me so funny? Because the boy won't be able to play the x box!

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

Want more? You might be interested in...