Why did Jerry Sandusky rape little boys? Because his penis was hard and he needed to get his nut off quick

Knock knock. Who isn't there? Not me. Don't come in. I won't.

What's brown and sticky? A stick.

Why was the teen boy shirtless? He was mauled by tigers.

why does Chuck Norris never get wet in the rain? Because he has a very serviceable umbrella

a Dyslexic, Agnostic, Insomniac stayed up all night, wondering if there really was a dog.

A man walks into a bar. He hasn't been there before, and it's a Friday so it's really crowded, and it's really quite a dive, so he and his girlfriend decide to leave and find somewhere else to eat.

One day Jesus said to John, " come forth and recieve everlasting life." Sadly John came in fifth and won a toaster.

Yo momma so stupid, she's stupider than this joke.

A Muslim walks into a bar No-one survives the blast

what's worse than getting cancer.........nothing cancer is a pretty bad thing

There are 11 people hanging onto a rope that comes down from an airplane. 10 of them are blonde, and one is a brunette. They all decide that one person should get off because if they don't, the rope will break and everyone will die. No one can decide who should go, so finally the brunette delivers a very touching speech, ending with the words, "I'll get off." The blondes, all moved by the brunette's speech, start clapping. Problem solved.

And if we met in 1780, I was a white southern aristocratic plantation owner and you were my dark skinned servant lady ... slave Whenever I could get away from the Mrs., I'd go to your shed and then I'd steal you kisses. But let's be serious, I'd still work you full time as a slave, there's a difference between romantic language and a complete disregard for socioeconomic trends.

Q: What did Tommy do when it was time to go to bed? A: Go to bed. Q:What did Tommy do when it was time to wake up? A: Kill him self.

A guy walks into a bar and says "ouch!" The bartender says "are you okay?" "Yeah I just stubbed my toe" Then the guy walks it off, and then orders a drink.

What kind of cheese isn't yours Nacho Cheese actually it depends on the type of cheese that you stole due to your kleptomania

Knock Knock, Who's there? Jim Jim who? Oops, wrong house.

What's worse than kissy face pictures on facebook? The porn pictures on facebook.

Oh no my baby is dead. Ha.

What made the old man laugh? A pile of dead babies.

Roses are red violets are blue I have boobs and so do you

Q: What happens when you throw a glowing purple rock into a bright green stream? A: It makes a splash

What did one volcano say to the other? Hey.... wana get some lunch... later, not now of course it's WAAAAY TOO EARLY!

How do you keep a secret? Kill yourself.

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

Want more? You might be interested in...