whats worse, being kicked in the balls or giving birth? losing an arm to meningitis

Why did the little boy cry? I cut off his toes one by one and shoved fireworks up his ass

What did my grandma tell me during a funeral? Nothing. It's her funeral. She's dead.

what do u call a black man a black man

What do a spoon and a platypus have in common? Nothing.

The teacher hands out tests to the students and some of the students say to the teacher "what does 'no grade' mean?" The teacher responds, "Oh I need to grade them still.")

Why wasn't the girl asked to the prom? Because she had cerebral palsy.

what's the black mans shirt made out of? cotton

I Won a Math Debate................ say it fast unless your blind then dont say it wait you cant read it so uhhm Alaska

Knock knock! Who's there? A bottle of beer. No thanks, I've been sober for 15 years.

Adam ci ?mierdz?cy kutas mi sie ya mam

Sorry not thinking here, of course I will arrive sooner, give me 20 minutes or so (got to scout the area, you never know) As for coding, there is no hidden meaning so yeah... That is probably some "Neronist" coding format I never knew of I am using so well. Cant drive like this, so I will use a cab and wait for you at the back seat or something, I will let the Taxi cab honk the numbers of code here so you can come out knowing its safe. I sincerely thought you where at the home, according to our coordinates you are... Dont tell me that bastard built some basement over there, wow! I really miss him now, if nothing else because I would have liked a wine cellar made in less than... Sorry, ill be there asap, 20 minutes or less, nah, believe me, "fancy" is the least of things I want, and I wont be changing my mind anytime soon. See ya. I am sincerely surprised you even remember me, then again I look a lot like your crush. Abel (in case you where wondering, this is not my name either, but you get the picture by now)

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Q: Why did the kid drop his icecream cone? A: Because he couldn't hold it he lost his arms in a car accident.

Why did the chicken cross the road? To make it home in time for Thanksgiving.

A man walks up to an attractive woman and asks "Is it hot in here, or is it just you?" The woman replies "No, it's hot in here. It is a record breaking 114 degrees outside, which means everybody is using their air conditioner. Due to the large amount of energy air condioners require, the power has gone out in this building and the air conditioner is not functional. The tempurature in the building is 103 degrees and three children are in the emergency room because of heat stroke."

I used to work at a chemical plant manufacturing hydrochloric acid. I couldn't handle it. One day a container exploded and I got severe chemical burns on my face. The scarring is awful. It has ruined my life.

Roses are red, violets are blue, f*** you, f*** you.

What did one dog say to the other dog? Woof woof

Tiny timmy likes timmy turner in his time of tingling on christmas.

What's the square root of everything. F**K LOGIC

Why are you reading this joke? There is this nice 'Bad Idea T-Shirts' ad right there.

I couldn't afford a hair cut... So i contracted cancer.

Why wasn't Jesus born in Poland? Because if he's an actual historical figure he would have been born in modern day Palestine.

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

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The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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