Knock knock. Who's there? Banana. Knock knock Who's there? Banana. Knock knock Who's there? You're in-laws. Bet you wish I said banana

Why are plants green? Plants are green due to the chloroplast organelles found in their cells. These membrane bound organelles are exclusive to plant cells and are used to convert sun light to usable chemical energy. This energy is stored in the form of ATP molecules, or adenosine triphosphate. When one of the three phosphate groups of an ATP molecule is removed, the molecule releases the energy put into this bond and becomes ADP, or adenosine diphosphate. Throughout this process, the organelle fulfills its sole function and at the same time gives plants their green color our eyes perceive today.

Why did the italian go to jail? because he had just robbed a bank and then brutally murdered his wife and kids.

An asian loses to you in starcraft..

How do you drown a blond? Glue a mirror to the bottom of a pool!

Why did the chicken cross the road? Because it had been used as an ingredient in kung pow chicken and was on it's way via delivery boy to the house that had ordered it for a lovely evening meal

knock knock who's there? to to who? to whom*

Honestly though bud, are you wasted? XD

What did grandma receive for her 75th birthday? Alzheimer's.

A dislexic man walks into a bra. He then proceeds to enjoy the breasts that he has stumbled upon.p

Why was Newton surprised when the apple fell on his head? Because he was sitting under a pear tree.

What does it mean if you have 5$ and Chuck Norris has 5$? Congrats! You both have five dollars!

Do you know what my favorite rhetorical question is?

So a guy walks into a bar. He asks the woman next to him, ''Can I buy you a drink?'' The woman says,''No thank you.''

If a tree falls down in the forest and no one is around to hear it, does God exist?

Why was the little boy upset? An arson set fire to his house, leaving him nowhere to live.

What's blue and orange at the bottom of a swimming pool? A dead baby, why's it there? I popped the arm bands.

How do you stop a bus? Throw a little child in front of it. If the driver is a loaf of bread, this phrase isn't rather important.

Why do Jewish people have such big noses? The nucleotides in their DNA are strung together in a certain sequence that makes them have large noses.

A man came home one day, drunk and feeling horny. He proceeded to the bedroom where he found his wife just getting into bed in a lace bra and sexy underwear. This turned him on even more so he cuddled up to her and whispered seductivly in her ear before kissing her neck. His wife was not in the mood for sex so she shot him

Superman, Batman and Spiderman are all in a race. Who wins? Grow up. Superheros aren't real.

How do you help a chronic drug addict? Buy him or her more drugs. They NEED it.

"33"

Why did the boy drowned Bc he couldn't swim

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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