I'm a white rapper I do it all the time Folks don't like me cuz my words don't match

roses are red violets are blue i have a big dick unlike you

Why did Sarah fall off the swing? She had no arms. Knock-knock. Who's there? Not Sarah.

i ate and i ate and i was sick on the floor 8x8=64

What do you call a black man flying a plane? A pilot

You ask a German how long it takes to go from Berlin to Amsterdam. He replies, ''About four hours by tank."

Stephen Hawkings viewed porn as a child

Why did the man follow the law? He didn't want to get arrested

What is another way to call a procrastinator? Avery annoyed and bored child who does not want to do her homework and is looking up many different anti-jokes for a laugh. You know who you are...

Knock knock Who's there? I eat myp.

Did you know Hellen Keller Had a pony neither did she

What did the robot say to the centipede? Stop being a centipede. (do you get it cause the robot has no arms)

Why did the blonde laugh at the funeral? She suffers from autism, and doesn't understand when it isn't appropriate to laugh. The mourners at the funeral, understanding this problem, ignored her and carried on with the service.

Who could be happier than a kid at a candyshop? A necrophiliac in a morgue

A teenage girl walks into a dark alley. She emerges on the other side completely unharmed.

Two men walk into a bar. You think the second man would have seen it.

Why couldn't the black man swim He never learned how.

"knock knock" "Come in"

What's the difference between a baby and a watermelon? One's fun to hit with a sledgehammer, the other one's a watermelon.

Q: A jew and asian and a normal white guy walk into a resturan, who orders the cheapest meal. A: the Asian, its 1940 and the jews dead

I just can't stand sitting down!

full house

Me: You know what's funnier than 24. Friend: 25? Me: No, 9/11

Why did the cookie go to the doctor? His health was dwindling ever since he was diagnosed with pancreatic cancer several years ago and this looked like the end.

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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