a horse walks into a bar, the bartender says "why the long face?", the horse incapable of understanding the English language promptly shits on the floor and eats a bar stool.

Q:Why do people not live forever? A: Because they die dumbass.

Q: Why did the bird fall out of the tree? A: It died. Q: Why did the snake fall out of the tree? A: It was stapled to the bird. Q:Why did the monkey fall out of the tree? A: Peer pressure.

how do you make money? you roba bank! :)

How do you seat four gay guys at a bar when there's only one stool? Flip the stool over.

How many dogs does it take to screw in a light bulb? Dogs do not have aposable thumbs therefore they cannot screw in light bulbs

What has two legs but can't walk? A quadriplegic man who lost mobility in his legs due to a horrific logging accident.

Roses are red Violets are blue Your ugly

Twenty-Four

Why was 6 afraid of 7? Because 7 is black

So an irishmen, jewish, and asain walk into the bar...and the bartender said get out..

how many aliens does it take to change a light bulb? i wouldn't know, i have never seen one and there is the off chance that they don't even exist

What lights up a soccer stadium? A soccer match.

What do you call a needle with two points? A two headed needle.

whats funnier than hugos penis? Nothing!!!!

Who has killed more people than Jeffrey Dahmer, John Wayne Gacy, and Jack Kevorkian combined? Mr. Rogers

How did the fat woman survive the car accident? She had on her seat belt.

Why did Susie fall off the swing Because she had no arms. Knock knock... Whose there... Not Susie Why did the plane crash Susie was flying it

Why was Newton surprised when the apple fell on his head? Because he was sitting under a pear tree.

Q:What did the furry say to the other? A: Probably nothing, cant be easy speaking with a dick in your mouth...

What do you call somebody pimping out their bitches for very large amounts of money???? A dog breeder.

knock knock who's there Berry Joe Berry Joe who? I just told you, Berry Joe. oh.

Why are there so many black basketball players? Because they aren't green.

What's the deal with airplane food? I've never tried it. I'm just curious how it was.

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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