How do you stop a clown from laughing? You hit it in the face with an axe.

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These Jokes suck.

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How are contortionists so flexible? They stretch.

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Now Showing: EVIL SLOTHS II "The worst death is a slow death."

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How many blondes does it take to change a lightbulb? One. This task does not require over 1 person to complete.

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Penis.

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What's black and white and red all over A bloody penguin

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Several men are in a bar a tall white man named James orders a round of shots for all of the people they all have a fun time untill James gets into a car with Derrick who is not sober they drive right into a sick childrens hospital and cause many frantic wild fires throughout the town. They all end up in jail for an unrelated cause

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Why can't Jimmy walk ever again? Because when he was 12 his father mistook him for a plank of wood a sawed his legs off. We may realise here that this prohibits him from walking.

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What did the young girl say to her step-dad? Nothing. She no longer talks to him after years and years of sexual abuse which left her emotionally scarred.

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What's the difference between a whore and a blonde? There is not enough information to answer this question.

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Student: May i go to the toilet? Teacher: What for? Student: To open the chamber of secrets!

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HI MY NAME IS DOUG

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lets have sex, ok, but itll have to be anal, cuz im a guy xoxox danni

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Why did the crack head cross the road? To get crack.

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Struggling with self esteem? Wish you were more attractive? Well stop wishing you fugly cum dumpster.

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Why can't a black guy be the King of England? He's not in line for it.

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why did the pirate have a patch? to crack the software he had downloaded

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One day, 2 people were gonna fight after school and then the final bell rung. Everyone gathered in the bathroom to watch the fight. The challenger asks the opponent, "Hey whats that one thing you say when you let the other person win?" then the opponent says, "I give up?" The opponent yells, "I win!"

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8====D~~~~~~

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Scenario: A man is being mugged in an alley Mugger: Give me your wallet! I have a gun! Victim: You don't have the balls. Mugger: Oh yeah! I have 3 balls! Victim: Well I have 2, you should probably get that checked.

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Q. What do you get when a banana and a person mate? A. The banana suffocates

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What did the Beatrice do after she got kicked off of X Factor? she went to a nearby store and bought a slim jim

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What do you call a cow climbing a tree? Amazing. How many cows have you seen climbing trees?

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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