Dr Dr I think I have diarrhea You have irritable bowel syndrome, I recommend IBS support

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whats big green and fuzzy and would kill you if it fell out of a tree? a pool table

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Whats the hardest part of eating a vegetable? The wheelchair.

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You really need some help in spelling the word GOD... Anyway, none of your fucking business.I am a child for this scenario only so... Moral: LET THAT CHILD ALONE!

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Why did the chicken cross the road? It wanted to see its chicks that got run over by a car.

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What's the difference between a duck? One of it's feet are both yellow.

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What's the difference between a baby and a watermelon? Chuck Noris

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What do you call a kid with no arms and an eye patch? Names

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captcha: all yer base

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Pee Pee bleekkka klup look? fupapapapapapapapap

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What do you do when you walk downstairs and see your TV floating? Call Ghostbusters.

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Why'd the man walk his dog His pen ran out of ink

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yous are all f u c k i n g dumb like rat kavanagh

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How did the family of Cubans get to Florida? They flew first class from their home in upstate New York.

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Q: What did Stevie Wonder eat for dinner last night? A: Something consumable

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Why do you not play poker with a cheetah. 1. Animals can't play card games. 2. Cheetahs are carnivores. Think about it.

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you are black i am black except for your big hairy ass

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If a girl sleeps with 20 guys, she's a slut. If a guy does the same... He's Gay.

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Lizzy doesnt shave or shower. She just went to the bathroom in the middle of the school hallway

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How could you ever watch a man hit another man and say nothing? UFC is on at 9:00pm.

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A man is about to rape a girl. Before penetration he carefully and correctly applies a condom as he practices safe sex and is not yet ready to father a child.

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What is 0% sugar, 100% pure, 150% hyperbole, 90% bug-free, has 4815162342 lines of code, autonomous, is awesome, bigger than a breadbox, bread is pain, is bringin' home the bacon, classy, doesn't use the U-word, deja vu, deja vu (oh wait a moment), does barrel rolls doesn't avoid double negatives, doesn't bother with clones, Engage!, Enhanced!, Euclidean!, Excitement!, Exploding creepers, Finally complete!, finger-licking, full of stars, funky LOL, GOTY, Give Us Gordon, Indev, Ingots, and has an End? Minecraft!

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Q: What is your favorite color? M: Blue

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Q: What is worse than The Apocalypse? A: Darkseid, Thanathos, Red Hulk, Onslaught, come on The Apocalypse cant even beat the X-men! Moral: "I AM THE APOCALYPSE, YOU ARE NOT FIT TO SURVIVE!"

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

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