Roses are red, violets are blue, I have a dick just for you

BOOBALANBOO

why was the spoiled girl running from her parents? because they weren't her parents, they were kidnappers and were going to sell her into underground sex trafficking markets where she would probably spend the rest of her life being a slave.

so i walk into a bar the bartender says what do you want i say a beer please he then goes one dear coming up soi thought tomy self should i tell him what i really said so i let him get the dear but for some reason he came out with tears i asked whats a matter he said you let me go to kill a dear

I watched The Pianist last night? Holocaust

What do you call a fat black guy in KFC? A guy who likes KFC.

Why did the chicken cross the road? It was free-range.

Whyd the girl fall of her bike? She rode over a curb

What did Snichols do when he murdered his ex-partner who became a lesbian? The ass dance.

why was the boy running? because his skin was burning off

A Jew throwing a dime into a wishing well? Highly unlikely.

Q:What's worse than stepping on lego? A:Hiroshima.

Q: What is worse than The Apocalypse? A: Darkseid, Thanathos, Red Hulk, Onslaught, come on The Apocalypse cant even beat the X-men! Moral: "I AM THE APOCALYPSE, YOU ARE NOT FIT TO SURVIVE!"

John: Do you like Cake? Sue: Yes. John: Alright.

This is apparently the only way to get to the "under review" section.

What's worse than finding a small cockroach in your drink? Finding a medium sized cockroach in your drink. What's worse than finding a medium sized cockroach in your drink? Genocide. What's worse than genocide? Finding a large sized cockroach in your drink.

How many black people does it take to screw in a lightbulb? There are many circumstances that could affect the outcome of the situation. One of them is whether or not the given people have or will soon obtain a ladder. In this case, the lightbulb could take more time than needed to be screwed in and effectively changed. Another key factor in the situation is the number of people. If there are enough people to reach the ceiling without a ladder, the lightbulb could be screwed in sooner or later than asked by the owner of the facility in which the lightbulb socket is installed. Finally, the height of the persons given is a crucial point in this situation. The people may be tall, thus allowing there to be fewer people needed. The people could be short and need a greater number of people than if the people were, perhaps, a bit taller. All in all, I'd say about 1-2.

Why did the chicken cross the road? to get to your house KNOCK KNOCK who's there? da chicken

say yes will u remember me in a year?yes will u remember me in a month? yes will u remember me in a week?yes will u remember me in a minute?yes will u remember me in a second?yes knock knock whos there u said u will remember me u dick

An Englishman, an Irishman and a Scotsman crashed onto a desert island... The Englishman swiftly used his satellite phone to broadcast their location and they were taken home to their worried families.

We have a 24hr fitness center...it is open from 6 to 11

Why did the house get trashed? Cause the babysitter was a rooster

What happens when you mix a black guy and a chinese guy. A disfigured man

Customer: Can I have a tin of red paint, please? Shop owner: I'm sorry sir, we only have yellow paint left. Customer: That's ok, I have my bike with me.

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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