so there are 3 people who have heard of this magical cliff; theyre names are harry, dick, and joe. how the cliff works is that when you jump off you turn into whatever you say as you jump. first harry jumps off and yells plane, he turns into a plane and flys off. next dick jumps off and yells bird he turns into a bird and flys off. finally joe steps up to the cliff as he was walking he trips and falls as hes falling he yells HARRY DICK he than hits the ground and dies. everyone mourned for such a well respected individual.

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jack and jill went up the hill to fetch a pail of water jack collapsed because of serious drug abuse and stress jill followed after not being able to handle the tragedy of her brothers death this wouldn't have happened if they got into my van when i asked them too.

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Why did the monkey fall out of the tree? He was dead......

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What did the priest say to the kid? You can tell your dog but nobody else, ok?

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How do you know if a girl is special? If she hates justin bieber, Twilight, and is open to threeways.

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What do you call a black guy with a peg leg? An amputee.

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How many dead babies does it take to paint a wall? Depends on how hard -you throw them.

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Why did everyone call the one-legged man Matt? Because that was his name.

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Why did billy fall off the sea-saw Because he got kicked in the throat

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a man walks into a bar. ouch.

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how many blonds does it take to screw in a lightbulb? one, because she is an intelligent and capable woman

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Christopher Reeve walks into a room.

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A girl dropped her pencil while sitting next to her bf... She glanced at his phone while he was texting a message that said "I love you"... The girl jumped up and called him every name she could think of and left the room... The message was to his mother! She didn't listen and left him... He killed himself because she left him... She killed herself because he killed himself... Moral of the story: Don't drop you pencil!

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What word is ten letters long and starts with gas? Gastronomy.

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After a long romantic date with my girl friend I went home. Upon walking to my bathroom for a dootie i realize that I'm gay. So I break up with my girl friend and I am now in a wonderful relationship with Jose, He sell's sea shells at discount prices.

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whats black and white and red all over? a zebra crossing after a horrible, horrible car accident

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What was jesus's first miracle? He made a blind man walk. And for the stupid people out there jesus's first supposed miracle was making a cripple Walk

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how do you make a plumber cry kill his family

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Why wasn't the turkey hungry on thanksgiving? Because it was dead!

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Roses are grey, Violets are grey, I am a dog

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Whats the difference between a horse and a snake? A snake is poisons, a horse is not.

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I'm not late, I'm fashionably tardy!!!!

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Which is longer? A rope...

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what do you call a blonde that spends fifteen thousand dollars at a bar? an alchoholic.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

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