What's the difference between a baseball player on the Yankees, and one on the Red Sox? One was named Jeff, the other wasn't.

Girl: what comes after 69? Boy: 70. Girl: no,toothpaste! Boy: ...

What did the doctor say when he lost his glasses? Where are my glasses?

A recently engaged couple are having sex. The man finishes in just under 3 minutes as usual. The woman then says "I love you" because they've been together for over 2 years and they care for each other very deeply.

One day, 2 people were gonna fight after school and the final bell wrung then they started the mtch and the challenger says, "Hey whats the one thing that you say when you don't want to fight and ypu let the other person win?" The other guy says, "I give up?" Then the challenger says, " I WIN!!!"

Why do Squirrels accidentally plant millions of trees. Because they they bury their nuts and forget where they are.

What became of the girl who drank shellac and died? Her poor father attempted CPR for three hours straight before being forced to give up on his child's life. A massive funeral was held; everyone she ever knew attended. It was a very sad affair.

Whats brown and sticky? Brown glue

Wade's the father

Buy one packet of condoms for the price of two packets of condoms, and you will be given a second packet of condoms ABSOLUTLEY FREE!

What did one mail box say to the other? NOTING! In-animate objects cannot speak...

25

Why didn't the girl put on her mascara? Because she was too poor to buy any.

A Muslim, a Jew, and a Christian walk into a bar. The bartender says, "Is this some kind of a joke?"

a horse walks into a bar, the bartender says: why the long face? he has cancer

what do you call someone that works in a corner shop? Mohamed

How do you confuse Hellen Keller? Put her in a circular room and tell her to find the corner.

Did you hear about the 2 guys who wanted to go to rome? They didnt go

What did little John get from reading this. Wait and you will see that the person who you were asking the question will give you a series of awkward faces until they lose interest.

Whats worse than finding a black man in your bed? After you sleep with him, he tells you he has AIDS.

A black man sits down to have a legal conversation with his state appointed attorney for the first time being arrested. They lawyer advises him to tell him the truth of exactly what happened. He proceeds to do so and is provided with excellent legal advice.

Why can't Helen Keller drive? Because she's dead

What did the elephant say to the goldfish? Nothing. Animals are unable to speak and fish aren't able to live on land

Roses are red Violets are blue I hate rhyming Penis

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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