A Priest, a Rabbi, and an Orca Whale walk into a local eatery to discuss what is on their mind. The Priest says he is proud that even though their community is comprised of people residing in many different religions, they still work together to strive for a better tomorrow. The Rabbi nods his head in agreement,he states that he is proud of all the hard working men in their community that are willing to make sacrifices for the needy. The Orca Whale also nods in agreement and pauses for a moment to think while he insight-fully gleams at his two other friends. The Mighty Orca Whale then contributes to the conversation by saying eeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuurrrr!

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Q- Why was Dan mourning the death of his wife? A- He wasn't he was mourning the death of his daughter who was killed in the same car crash as her mother.

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How do you make a mail man cry? Run him over with a forklift.

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Q:Why couldn't the baby walk down the hall way? A: It had a javelin stuck in its head.

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Why did the man float in the lake? Because he had more fat than average, so he was very buoyant

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Why did the little kid use pillows at night? Because he was constipated.

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Why was the man so unhappy. he died

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Why did the little girl fall off of the swing? She didn't have any arms.

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what did the robot say to the centipede. Stop being a centipede!!!! Its funny because robots have arms.

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How do you kill one Jew. A gun. How do you kill a thousand Jews. With a millon angery germans.

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how do make a condom fly around the room? Piss it off!

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What's worse than finding a worm in your apple? Lots of things. Life isn't all about you, you know.

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Where does Frosty the Snowman keep his money? He doesn't keep it. His lifespan is too short to make significant compound intrest.

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What's the difference between a duck and a goose? They are obviously different species but they both have wings and are birds and are actually pretty similar. Geese are usually bigger though I guess.

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Whats worse than a bunch of teen-agers throwing kitrens at my house I didn't save them because I thought they were jehovahs witness's

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What's grey and looks good on policemen? your mom.

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Why was six afraid of seven? Because SEVEN-FIVE!!!

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What did the Catholic Priest do to the 9-year-old boy? He ate him. The priest was actually Jeffery Dahmer.

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What did the deer say to the hunter? Deers are animals, they haven't yet evolved enough to talk..

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Listen Nero, lol "listen", anyway, you seem pretty quick to take the blame for my mistakes here, I mean sigh... ...I would never send anyone to harass anyone, but then again I should never allowed them to join in the first place, how bad is that eye doing by the way? I am deeply sorry, I never meant for anything like this to happen. I am eating as I write, I mean I am still scared, I would not blame you if you still keep burning anger towards me.

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What is hotter than two girls making out? The Sun.

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Gestapo.

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Why did the cow die? Because we need meat

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Johnny got hit by a bomb. Where is he now? Everywhere. Knock knock. (Who's there?) Not Johnny

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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