An American man and a Chinese man have a conversation. The American man asks the Chinese man after a couple of minutes of speaking, "How long have you lived in the United States?" The Chinese man replies, "I moved to the United States when I was ten years old."

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1 woman and 2 guys were on a roadtrip. Every single day they would go do the same things. First go to Denny's, then to the mall, then see a horror movie. One day the woman said, "I don't want to go see the horror movie, I'm scared enough!" So the guys agreed that they'd trick the woman into going to a horror movie before Denny's. They went, and the woman was scared out of her mind. She yelled at them both for 30 minutes and to this day never speaks to them.

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Why did the guy kill his friends? He didn't, he doesn't have any friends

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A Japanese man walks into a bar, it collapses and then is demolished by a tsunami.

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What's heavier: a kilogramme of steel or a kilogramme of feathers? A kilogramme of steel, because steel is heavier than feathers.

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What do you cal a black boy with a bike? A thief

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What did one muffin say to the other? I don't know, but you need a psychiatrist.

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Roses are red hulk is green, I'd smash that ass, If you know what I mean !

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why was the old woman angry? fig pudding.

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Question : Why did the boy need to change his pants? Answer: During recess, the little boy was running to fast and fell on the ground. Then kid he has been bullying pissed on his leg.

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Why did the chicken cross the playground? To get to the other slide.

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The man who ran behind the bus got exhausted. The man who ran in front of the bus got tired. The first one survived.

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"Knock, Knock" "Go away, I have a lot of stuff to do right now and knock knock jokes suck."

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What did the monkey say to the garbage collector? Eiiiiijajajaajaja EIIIIJAAAA

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I used to walk in front of archers, but then I took an arrow to the knee.

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Why are black guys so tall? Because their knee grows

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Whats sad about 3 mexicans getting hit by a train They were remodeling my kitchen

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What do you call someone in Manhattan who goes to see a Broadway show and then stops in at a local bar for a few drinks? A taxi, if they request you do so.

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Contrary to popular belief- And this just in. My daughter has breast cancer.

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My butt!!!!

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why cant sophie lifeguard safely because she cant swim that good

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When geese fly, they often fly in a V-formation. Why is one side of the V is always longer than the other? Because there are more birds on that side.

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what do you call a black guy in a cop car a cop

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if a kayak was stuck in a tree with its headlights on, how many pancakes stacked will it take to get to the moon? none because snakes dont have armpits

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

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Anti-Joke Chicken

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