whos got a massive fukkinn melon...B.I.M

Why did the chicken cross the road? There was food there.

Where did Susie go during the bombing? Everywhere

Tim: Jason, your dumb Jason: No I'm not.

Character one: What did the blond say to the horse? Character two: you spelled blonde wrong.

What did one rock say to the other rock? Nothing, rocks are inanimate objects, therefore rendering them unable to participate in the activity of speech.

What do you call a person with no eyes? Blind.

What did the 5 year old girl ask Santa for Christmas? A pony.

How did the guy with aids die? He died of aids

husband; do you come here often wife: i live here

What do you call a retarded man? Nothing, because it's inappropriate to call retarded people names.

How did sally fall off the swings? she had no arms. Knock knock, who is there? Not sally.

Take my wife. . . . to the hospital. She is dying from a gunshot wound to the head.

"Oh yeah?!" "Yeah!" "You wanna go?!" "No, sorry. I got plans." (walks away)

Q: How many blondes does it take to screw in a lightbulb? A: It doesn't matter, the lightbulb never went out in the first place.

What type of movies do pirates watch? None they are on a boat!

Goat balls.

-hey sam look what mom gave me for christmas -what eli? -a new baseball bat -thats your prosthetic leg silly

How do you kill a blue elephant, with a blue elephant gun, how do you kill a pink elephant, you strangle it until it turns blue and shoot it with a blue elephant gun.

If John has 50 candy bars, and he eats 45, how many cadybars does John have? Diabetes, John has diabetes.

im jewish

Why was the Amish man dead? Because he fell off of his fridge, while trying to screw in a light bulb.

knock knock who's there a black person SHIT!!!!

What's white and black and red all over? Slaughtered Cows.

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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