A devout Islamic man walks into a weapons of mass destruction store he is shocked and appalled at how easily such dangerous weapons can be bought.

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What did the librarian say to the rude man who was talking very loudly? The librarian said "shhh keep it down."

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I wonder what mute people say to themselves. :/

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Why is Jesse so fat? A horse, Because a cow gives milk thus creating pee wee Herman to jack off at an astonishing speed

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Michael walked into a bar, The rest of the bar initially erupted with laughter until the his carer made everybody aware that Michael suffered from brittle bones and that he had actually fractured his hip after colliding with the bar. People then understood the gravity situation as the bartender immediately dialled the emergency services. Michael managed to recover physically from the accident but to this day he is still scarred from the laughter aimed at him the night of his accident and is too afraid to return to the bar again in fear of being mocked despite the misunderstanding of the situation.

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Have you seen Stevie Wonder's house? No. Well, neither has he

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Do you know how I know you're gay? 'Cuz your dick taste like shit.

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All the other kids with the pumped up kicks died in a school shooting.

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What do you do when you come across a dead baby? Add it to your collection.

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Why did the chicken cross the road? it was thrown

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the awkward moment when your mom wakes you up and you realize she died six years ago

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Roses are Red Violets are Blue Your Adopted Deal With It!!!

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What do you call a joke that isnt funny? This one.

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Whats invisible and smells lile carrots? Rabbit fart

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How do you keep black people from your Kool-aid? How? You put it in a safe-deposit box.

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what do u call a hairy cow? Harry

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What's hot and cold at the same time? Hotcold.

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Why did the cat scratch the person? Because it's mean.

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What's worse than celery stuck between your teeth? A cruise ship stuck between your teeth.

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Your mamas so fat that she went to the doctor and he said she has a very high case of diabetes so now she's trying to excerise more and watching what she eats.

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Why did the chicken cross the road? To get to your house. Knock knock. Who's there? The chicken.

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How many babies does it take to paint a fence? depends on how hard you throw them.

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OMG I JUST FOUND THE GREATEST WEBSITE YOU SHOULD TOTALLY CHECK IT OUT OMG ITS http://anti-joke.com/submit

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Knock, knock. You do realize you can actually physically knock on the door instead of just imitating the sound effect with your mouth, right? It's actually way more effective that way. Just saying, since it's raining outside and you're cold and want to come in...

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

Anti-Joke Triceratops