Roses are black, Violets are black, I'm blind.

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What do you call 20 blondes in a freezer? dinner

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Knock Knock. Please stop peddling your religion on my doorstep. .

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Justin Bieber

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What did the clock say to the book? I have no batteries.

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What do you call a cat with 1 eye, 4 legs, and its tongue out? Road kill.

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How many alcoholics does it take to change a light bulb? Look. I just enjoy a few drinks every now and then. I mean, I can quit whenever I want to. That's no reason to start people calling names.. Wait, no. That's not.. Look. How much do you drink every day, huh? Why not ask that? And why do I have to be the one changing your stupid light bulb? If it's sooooo important that the light bulb be changed, do it yourself, you lazy bastard. Don't rely on other people to do your work for you.

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Little molly says she wants to have a baby when she grows up because her little baby brother died of ta-sacs 6 months after birth.

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How do you keep an elephant from charging? Ask nicely.

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What do the Irish do on their birthdays? Eat birthday cake and sing happy birthday

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Q: What goes up but doesn't come down? A: Columbia

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What do you get a man that has evreything? Aids

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You can pick your friends you can pick your nose but you cant pick your friends nose.

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Person 1: Why can't a T-Rex clap? Person 2: BECAUSE THEIR ARMS ARE TOO SMALL! Person 1: No, because they are extinct dumbass

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Why Was the straight man in love ? because he was an intelligent human being who had the formula of understanding woman .

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How do you kill a blind man, run over him in slow motion

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There's nothing more natural than the coals under the fire...

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There's a blind man walking on the south coast of England. He walks off a cliff.

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What did the young man's clothes smell like after a long night of partying? Laundry detergent, it was quite pleasant

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"Ask me if I'm a tea pot" "Are you a tea pot?" "No" Try this on your friends

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How did the dead baby cross the road? It was stapled to the leg of a chicken.

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How was my day, you ask? First of all, I don't own a day. And second of all, it hasn't ended.

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What's worse that tripping over on your way home from work? Finding your entire family murdered

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what do you do when you see a black man limping across your frontyard? you stop laughing an reload.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

Anti-Joke Triceratops