A traveling salesman stops at a farmer's house. The farmer then offers the salesman a bed with his daughter. The salesman quickly replied, "I don't want to go to bed right now. I need to know the way to Pawtucket." The farmer then gave the salesman directions and the two parted ways.

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I admit I don't know what the future holds, but one thing I know for sure is that... Lance Armstrong has only one ball.

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Why did the teacher fall on her face? She was shot in the back of her head.

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Why did the cow say moo? Cows can't say anything they actually make noises that humans interpreted as "moo"

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What do you call a man covered with cottoncandy and goes to the store and buys a jar of pickles? George

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So there was a guy in the middle of the street, how did he survive? ...He doesnt because he gets hit by a car becuase hes in the middle of the street...

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whats worse than catching your parents having sex? having sex with your parents

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What's the difference between a pile of dead babies and a Corvette? I DON'T have a Corvette in my garage.

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Hey you must be a parking ticket, because your yellow.

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whats the difference between a black man and a cat? you dont run from a cat

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how do u stop a cat from peeing on the floor? Kill it... haha

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Why is six afraid of seven? Because seven three twelve. Am i doing it right?

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civil rights

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What's hot and cold at the same time? Hotcold.

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What's sad about 4 black people in a Cadillac going over a cliff? It was my car.

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What did the pilot say to the female flight attendant? He told her to never tell his wife about the time they spent in mexico or he'd bludgeon her to death with a hammer.

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anti-joke.ru - russian style

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Q: What did one water bottle say to another water bottle? A: Nothing. Water bottles are inanimate objects and are thus unable to communicate.

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these guys im about to shoot owen,john,henry,shawn

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why didn't the baby cry once it came out of the womb? because it was a stillborn.

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Why did Hitler shoot himself? Because he found out Chuck Norris was a Jew.

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What do you get when you cross a rhino and a whale? Comment your answer:

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Whats sadder than 20 dead babies nailed to a tree? The Parents...

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What do a worm and a human have in common? They both have arms and legs apart from the worm

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

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