A blonde, a redhead, and a brunette are on a cruise together. A horrifying accident occurs, sinking the boat and killing all of them. Their deaths are mourned by their respective family members.

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What do you call a white guy in a mostly black neighborhood? His name.

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What make's a constuction worker drop's his hammer? MC Hammer moves.

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Sherlock Holmes and Dr. Watson go camping, and pitch their tent under the stars. During the night, Holmes wakes his companion and says: 'Watson, look up at the stars, and tell me what you deduce.' Watson says: 'Someboby stole our tent.' Holmes and Watson look at each other, shrug and go back to sleep. At least the thief kept their blankets.

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Why didn't the skeleton go to the dance ? "because he had nobody to go with" No because it was dead.

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A blonde walks into a bar. The bartender says, "What're you drinking?" The blonde says, "Nothing yet. That's why I'm in a bar. But your lack of basic observation skills is disturbing."

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Whats Green and Smells Like Grass? Grass

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whats the difference between a pizza and a jew? Pizza is not human, Jewish people are.

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Two muffins are in an oven one muffin says to the other muffin "It's hot in here" the other muffin says "Holy crap a talking muffin".

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Stalin and Hitler went to Kmart to buy mini-toothpaste. Because they schleifen schlafanned on their way to the country club.

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How do you know there's an elephant in your refrigerator? Look at your refrigerator.

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Why did the father leave work early on his son's birthday? He was rushed to the hospital after facing a severe heart attack due to a history of cardiovascular disease in his family.

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Why couldn't the white guy tell the two asians apart? They were identical twins.

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Three Kids dressed as a bear, a chicken, and a penguin walk into a bar. The bartender asks the to leave as they are all under the legal drinking age.

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"I love you terribly!" said the girl to her new boyfriend. "You already had me chained to the bed. You didn't have to break both of my legs, Kathy Bates."

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Q: Why is grass green? A: I painted it.

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Knock Knock Who's there? Gilbert Gilbert who? Goddamn it David just open the door

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Whats a black and white and red all over? i dont know...who spends their time researching this kind of stuff

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5 Italian guys from Long Island

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Why couldn't the melons get married? As gay cantaloupes, their jurisdiction didn't allow for same-sex marriage.

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my friend got in a car wreck,he lost his left arm and left leg. how is he now? Hes all right.

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Roses are red, Violets are blue, I've got a gun, get in the van.

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Billy: Why do pirates say rrrrr? Mark: I don't know, I'm not a pirate.

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Knock knock. Who's there? Big Brother. Big Brother who? That's right. ALL are who, Akbar!

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

Anti-Joke Triceratops