There are two muffins sitting in an oven, one muffin says to the other; boy it's hot in here. the other other muffin doesn't reply because it's a muffin, muffins don't talk. Now consider that the first muffin was a squirrel, A TALKING SQUIRREL!

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Did you see my sandwitch? No. I am your sandwitch, and therefore no one thought to put me up to a mirror. Would you like me to? No. I have no eyes. And why are you talking to a sandwitch??? ...

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Q: Why is daddy wrestling mommy? A: Well Jimmy, that is called sexual intercourse. That is how you were created, and many people of all ages engage in this activity every second.

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A black man shoots someone. He was a cop and he killed a dangerous man who attacked him.

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Two men are making sandwiches, one man is spreading peanut butter over the bread and the other man is spreading honey and Italian raspberry jam over rye bread. the man with the peanut butter sandwich looks over and says "HEY, where did you get the rye bread?" and the man with the rye bread says "well my wife made it yesterday and I would be delighted if you come over for some tea, and tried some of my wife's homemade rye bread".

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Why couldn't Helen Keller drive? She was a woman

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George Lopez never said anything funny in his life.

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Sarah Palin.

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Why is nate asian? no one knows neither of his parents appear to be of asian desent

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why was the black kid made fun of at school? Because he was a nerdy boy who drinks tea

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Why did the man cross the road? He was in a state of depression and chose to commit suicide.

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what is green and red and goes 100 miles per hour? frog in a blender

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why did the chicken cross the road to get to your house knock knock whos there the chicken

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Knock knock. Who's there? Super Monkey Ball Deluxe. Super Monkey Ball Deluxe who? Oh no.

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Why did the old man fall down the stairs? Because he was on his wheelchair.

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my friend died in a car crash, now i have no friends.

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what's 2 + 2 ? 4, unless you add it up wrong.

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Whats cooler than cool? nothing because cool does not have a defined temperature therefore nothing can be cooler than it.

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what sucks blows and gets laid in the closet. YOUR MOM VACUMING

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A black man walks into a bar. The barman says 'We don't serve your kind here'. The man leaves and goes to a nearby bar that doesn't have racist staff.

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Why doesn't the farmer have a dog? He doesn't like dogs.

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There were two muffins in an oven. One muffin says to the other, "Does it feel hot in here?". The other muffin says back, "Holy crap! It's a talking muffin!".

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Q. Why doesn't a woman need a wrist watch? A. Because they're actually becoming generally obsolete with the advent of the cell phone.

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Hey Bill, did you know we have a black guy in our family tree? Really? Yeah, he's still hanging there

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

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