What did one Teacher say to the other teacher? Nothing. The first teacher has a horrible drinking habbit which is getting out of hand, He beats his wife and children each night after his drinks at the bar. His parents have stopped all contact and he found some divorce papers in his wifes draw, also saying she would be getting full costudy of the children. He has lost the majority of his friends and didnt want to loose another one, and kept his problems to himself.

thumb_up thumb_down +6

What did the milk bottle say to the other milk bottle? Nothing. Bottles can't talk you silly goose.

thumb_up thumb_down +6

Q: What do you call a man with no arms and no legs going down a mountain? A: As good as dead.

thumb_up thumb_down +6

Why was Sally in a wheelchair? Her abusive father beat her repeatedly with a rake.. Then as she crawled out the door to try and get help, the abusive father took his Dodge Ram and ran over her legs reapeatedly. Then began to slap her. Luckily, a vigilante saw the whole thing and slaughtered the father with an axe and carefully escorted Sally to the hospital. After a couple of weeks of beautiful and extraordinary care, Sally made a full recovery and was able to leave.. and all patients have to leave in a wheelchair

thumb_up thumb_down +6

there were two cyclists cycling down a main road in china at exactly the same time and exactly the same pace, one being chinese and the other irish. why did the irish man get stopped and the chinese man not? because the irish man had in fact raped and murdered a young child in his native home town and then fled the country to china.

thumb_up thumb_down +6

why is six afraid of seven? Because seven is a rapist

thumb_up thumb_down +6

dont you hate it when your reading something and it doesnt end the way you cactus

thumb_up thumb_down +6

roses are blue violets are red crap i screwed up dont judge me

thumb_up thumb_down +6

What happens when two elephants go out in the rain? They get wet.

thumb_up thumb_down +6

Roses are red, Violets are blue, This is a poem about Red rosses and blue violets

thumb_up thumb_down +6

My grandpa died in the holocaust. How? He had gas.

thumb_up thumb_down +6

Theaters say silence is golden... Trap silence in a jar, make millions.

thumb_up thumb_down +6

Q: What's brown and sticky? A: Feces

thumb_up thumb_down +6

What's funnier than ten dead babies nailed to one tree? Nothing, infant mortality is not a laughing matter.

thumb_up thumb_down +6

Roses are red Violets are blue Dandelions are weeds

thumb_up thumb_down +6

Knock Knock Who's there? The KKK, got any blacks?

thumb_up thumb_down +6

What do you call somebody with no arms or legs and they are stranded in the middle of the ocean? Answer: screwed

thumb_up thumb_down +6

What did one muffin in an oven say to another muffin? Nothing, muffins are inanimate objects thus incapable of sppech.

thumb_up thumb_down +6

roses are blue violets are red dont judge me

thumb_up thumb_down +6

What did one cat say to the other cat? Nothing.

thumb_up thumb_down +6

Why was the camel sad he wasnt, camels dont have feelings

thumb_up thumb_down +6

Whats the difference between a baby and a sandwhich... I dont rape my sandwhiches before i eat them

thumb_up thumb_down +6

Why did Gary have severe learning difficulties? Because his mother drank a lot of alcohol while she was pregnant, and it harmed his development significantly.

thumb_up thumb_down +6

Why did the chicken cross the road? Because he was walking.

thumb_up thumb_down +6

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

Want more? You might be interested in...


Anti-Joke Chicken

Anti-Joke Triceratops