Fiona: SHREK! WHERE WERE YOU TONIGHT? Shrek: Out clubbing with the boys. Fiona: What did you do. Shrek: Eat Jews. Borat: iz vedy naaace

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Why was the wife laying on the ground crying? Because she wasn't in the kitchen making a sandwich for her husband

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An orphan falls off a cliff.

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Ring Ring Hello? Click

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Why didn't suzzana go to school on Monday?? Because it was Sunday...I lied about it being monday

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What did the penguin say to the other penguin? Nothing, penguins don't talk.

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A German, an Irishman, a Mexican and a Texan are flying together on an airplane over the ocean. When the plane begins to experience engine trouble, they find that there is only one parachute for the four of them! Through an amazing display of flying skill, however, the pilot is able to complete the flight and land safely.

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A duck walks into a bar and says to the bartender "Put it on my bill."

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Why did the chicken cross the road? It didn't. At what point would a chicken consciously know it was crossing a road.

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Awesome! I've just received my free minecraft giftcode! >> minecraftnow.us <

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Why did the little girl pull her hair out? She didn't, It's a side-effect of the chemotherapy.

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Okay, hundred billions, and because I am fucking hungry, we make it perpetual, now the longer you keep the feeling going, the stronger and stronger and you know, trillions, indefillions, nondecillions, hell, make up your own numbers and just consider them higher. Bet its starting to feel pretty nice huh?

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Steven Hawking walks into a bar. Steven Hawking is disabled from the neck down. I lied.

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Q: Have you ever seen Ray Charles wife? A: Nethier has he.

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If you're American when you go into the bathroom , and you're American when you come out of the bathroom, what are you when you're in the bathroom. Ha, joke is on you because Americans don't pee.

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Why did the girl drop out of school? She was being sexually assaulted by her mothers alcoholic boyfriend and was having trouble coping.

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Knock knock who's there?... a stupid punchline because the door is imaginary and I am just wasting your time telling a knock knock joke

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Why are fish so easy to weigh? Because usually they've been killed, stunned or sedated first.

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why did the car go to the bathroom? it had gas.

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y was man afaid of fire?, cuz its hot

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What do call a man with a daranged wife? Married

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What's big or small, can come in different colors, and would kill you if it was forced inside you? A refrigerator.

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23 convicts were showering. One of them dropping his soap bar. The person next to him picked it up, and the one who dropped it said thanks.

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Why did the chicken cross the road?

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

Anti-Joke Triceratops