Roses are brown Violets are brown Who pooped in my garden?

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Why did the little boy ride his bike to school? It was a birthday present.

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Why was the girl-scout crying? I hit her in the knee with a baseball bat.

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Why did Larry fall off his bike? He was hit in the head with a brick...

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What do you call cheese that you don't own? Cheese.

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An astronaut and a cosmonaut are sitting in a bar, discussing who was better. The cosmonaut says, "We Russians were the first people in space!" The astronaut says, "That may be true, but we were the first to land on the moon my friend." The cosmonaut turns back to the astronaut and says, "Yes, but we shall be then first to ever land on the Sun!" So, the astronaut skeptically asks, "And how do you intend to do that?" The cosmonaut replies, "Simple.......we will go at night." Thank you to David Cross

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why did the squrill leave his home an ax-man cut it down

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An old man, and his daughter are walking down the street. They are having a nice time, until the daughter turns around to see the old man lying on the ground in pain because of the crippling arthritis in his back that has caused him agony and discomfort for years.

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Knock Knock. Who's there? Your landlord your being evicted we need you out in 2 weeks.

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Why can't Michael J. Fox draw a perfect circle? Because he's human.

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A guy wanted to write a joke. He didn't.

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Why did the man walk into the wall? He was blind.

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whats wores than eating a vag. a gaint vag eating you.

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A jew walk's into a bar. But actually it was a Gas chamber.

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A man walks into the bar and orders a drink. This is what you do in a bar.

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Person 1 Hey man what's up Person 2 nothing much I just impregnated your mom

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A rabi and a priest go out for a coffee they talk for a while and go on there way

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What is grey and transparent? An elephant in a zip-lock bag.

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Why did the chicken cross the road? Cause he felt like it.

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if bought jim bought 78 sweets and he eats 68 what does jim have left? diabetes

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What do a goat and an eagle have in common? They both can fly, except for the goat.

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A turtle walks into a bar. The bar tender says "what will it be?" the turtle doesnt reply because its a turtle and the bar tender is sent to a mental hospital for talking to turtles.

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A blonde dies Lololol

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Where would canada be without nature? still here

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

Anti-Joke Triceratops