jeanna:fu** jack:did u just say fu** jeanna:jew? jack:fu** u jew

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A duck walks into a bar and asks for a beer. The bartender realizing this is an odd situation, seeing that ducks cannot articulate the English language, realizes he must be dreaming. He wakes up and turns to tell his wife about the dream, but she won't respond. He then realizes how his marriage is in shambles...

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whats big and can vibrate after you turn it on? A washing machine.

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What did the duck say to the Pope? Quack.

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My mother's star sign was Cancer. Ironic how she died really. She was attacked by a giant crab.

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What's black, white, and red all over? Numerous different objects because many different things can posses a variety of colors, including the ones listed above.

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Roses are red the grass is green now open your legs and let me fill you with cream

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What’s spotty, has three legs and is green all over? …well?

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What's harder to pick up, a football or an anvil? It doesn't matter when you lost your fingers in 'nam.

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Why was the girl running? She had to catch her bus.

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whats worse then getting a parking ticket? the plague

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What did the man screem before he crashed his car? i dont know, he died.

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What is similar between the Holocaust and soccer? They both suck.

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Why did Mia fall off of Lucy's bike? Because Lucy didn't like Mia and shot her in the face.

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What goes up a hill with four legs and comes down the hill with five? A creepy animal that grows legs when it goes down hills.

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4 gay men walked into a bar. it was a gay bar. all 4 men had a good time

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That`s my friends phone, I can call you from mine too if you want, please just don't hurt me, let me speak to you, I promise I will explain everything.

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Knock Knock Who’s there? Tom Tom who? Tom Pearson? Oh Tom, I wasn’t expecting you til 3pm, please come in.

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why are you going to laugh at this its reallly dumb

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What did the boy with no legs get for his birthday? A bike

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How do you make a clown stop smiling? Hit him in the face with an axe.

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Roses are brown, Violets are brown, WHO THE HELL $#!T IN MY GARDEN?!

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99 bottles of beer on the wall, 99 bottles of beer, take one down pass it around, 98 bottles of beer on the wall. 10 minutes into the song one man succumbs to alcohol poisoning.

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What does the Bill in Bill Clinton stand for? Bilious.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

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