How did young Austin get home while walking on the side of the street ? He didnt. He was hit by a car.

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Your mom is so poor She will soon have to make the difficult decision whether or not to put you up for adoption

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Roses are red violets are blue im a mass murderer and i will kill your family with no hesitation

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roses are red violets are green id love to flick owen cliffords mams bean

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Why did Jill fall off the swings? -Because she had no arms. Knock Knock? --Who's there? Not Jill. What did Jill get for Christmas? -What? I don't know. She couldn't open it.

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What's worse than finding out that your dog has worms? Finding out that you have worms.

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What's 9 + 10 19 AB

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Ed has spent all his days on the farm. It was the farm of his father and grandfather before him; long have they prospered from the fruits of this land. He has a wife and 3 beautiful children, all of whom live happily on the farm. Ed still manages to keep an active social life, and has lots of interesting friends. His best friend is Moe. As a young man, Ed had spent a few years living in the city for his studies. Moe lives in the city, and he knows Ed from College. One day, Moe came out to the farm to have lunch with his old friend. After lunch, he and Ed took a walk around the farm. They passed by the horses, the chickens, the pigs and finally they came to the cows. Ed looked at Moe, and he saw that he was focused intently on a single cow. "What's the matter, Moe?" he asked. "That," Moe said, "is one skinny cow."

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What's the difference between an Elephant and a Post Box? An Elephant is not a Post Box. It is an Elephant.

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Excuse me, do you have any gnats? Yes, plenty. Thank you

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why was the little boy crying? he was at his mother's funeral.

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Q: If your 17 year-old-daughter is a drug addict, how many cartwheels are you going to have to do to make it to Georgia? A: The French Revolution, because your grandmothers facebook shows an 11 year-old selling Concords to a green alien, which can only mean that over 600 people watch pórn daily.

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Why did the chicken cross the road? The farm was sold and he had no other place to go.

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why was the Jewish person accused of stealing money? because the police found his finger prints.

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What's gay black & Jewish? The Ku Klux Klan

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What day is it today? It's "Jack Daniels Day" according to that guy with the shopping cart filled with kittens.

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Two colleague janitors sit next to each other in the coffee room, one says to the other: About yesterday... I checked three times and it looks pretty normal. Sorry... I wasn't around to hear the question the other posed the day before, but I heard it's supposed to be pretty funny with this answer. So... Less is better then none, right?

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Why did the little boy refuse to kiss his grandmother? He was afraid she would slip him some tongue.

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what's gray, red, and goes over a 100 mph? a toad in a blender

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Why was a white man surrounded by black men crying? He was in a support group for black men with vitiligo, which destroys skin pigments.

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Why was Helen Keller a bad driver? She was blind.

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Q: Why did the plane crash? A: The driver was a loaf of bread

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Obama lin Baden.

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Whats the difference between a garage full of dead babies and a garage full of money? I don't have a garage full of money

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

Anti-Joke Triceratops