What did the female lady person say to the baby? Get Some.

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Q. How do you make your neighbor mad? A. Run his kids over.

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In the attic lights Voices scream Nothin' seen Real's the dream Leaving the things that are real behind Leaving the things that you love from mind All of the things that you learned from fears Nothin' is left for the years Voices scream Nothin' seen Real's the dream Toys, toys, toys In the attic Toys, toys, toys In the attic Toys, toys, toys In the attic Toys, toys, toys In the attic Lights, voices scream Nothin' seen Real's the dream Leaving the things that are real behind Leaving the things that you love from mind All of the things that you learned from fears Nothin' is left for the years Voices scream Nothin' seen Real's the dream Toys, toys, toys In the attic Toys, toys, toys In the attic Toys, toys, toys In the attic Toys, toys, toys In the attic Toys, toys, toys In the attic Toys, toys, toys In the attic Toys, toys, toys In the attic

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Eric went for a poo in the public toilets. After he finished, he realised that there was no toilet roll. So he had to just pull up his pants and put up with his sshitty arse for the rest of the day. Unfortunately, he was in a board meeting and when he went in he stank of shit and it was a very uncomfortable feeling.

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Why did the fat person build a lift in his house? He was caring for his terminally ill mother which has a cancer and got both her legs amputated due to the cancer spreading to her legs.

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Q. Why did the blonde die drinking milk? A. she was shot in the head by a 22.

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4 score and 7 years ago was 1965

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What starts with F and ends with uck? Fire truck

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You know that song "FIrework" by Katy Perry? Well, I ate a hotdog last night.

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What did the tree say to the kite? She got hit by a fridge.

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Chip and Dale walk into a bar. Chip is black now.

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Why is Joe is ugly? I dont Know

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Why did Chuck Norris eat a sandwich? Because he was hungry.

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Knock knock. Who's there? AV. AV who? Asshole vison. Now that's Amusement Vision. (Remembering Amusement Vision...)

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In the movie Dark Skies, little white boys were haunted by a mysterious force. The answer is obvious, isn't it? They are being haunted by Michael Jackson's ghost.

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roses are red violets are blue ill keep u in my heart forever and ower baby to

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What's brown and sticky? Most forms of excrement.

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How is a raven like a writing desk? Both have absolutely nothing to do with the other one.

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Lol, she does not think anything, she knows. Its not unfaithfulness if you ask for permission and are granted so because the trust is strong and mutual.

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How do you tell if a politician is lying? You make him take a polygraph test.

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What's Blue And Fat? A Brick. I like to lie a lot.

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knock knock whos there a duck a duck who QUACK!

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Why did the duck eat the fish? It needed protein.

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vatalk you are retarded!!!!!

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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