I thought about taking a nice warm shower, but then I realized that the power was out and it would probably be a cold shower.

Just the other day there was a house, and unforunatly Bob was a burn victim, the doctors said that he would have had a slow and excruciatingly painful death... Luckily he was already dead!

What did little Timmy get for Christmas after he was diagnosed with leukemia? A gift card to Bed Bath and Beyond because he was interested in redecorating.

what did pedobear say to the 60 year old man nothing he was too busy molesting the girl across the street

Why can't Michael Jackson play chess? Because he is no longer alive.

Knock Knock I have a f*cking doorbell you asshole

what's the easiest way to tell time? a clock

DERP

What's worse then three frogs playing leap frog? Nothing that would be awesome

'How do you make a plumber cry? Buy him a belt for Christmas.

Why can't Michael Jackson work at a boy scouts camp? Because he's dead.

If life's a box of chocolates, I'm the dominant male.

A man walks into a bar and sits down. The bartender then lights him on fire.

What's black and hangs from a tree? A tire swing.

Knock Knock. READ THE DAMN SIGN IT SAYS NO SOLICITORS!!! ... yeah.

Why did Batman brush his teeth? So he wouldn't get bat breath

Did you hear that the actress, Reese what's-her-name, got stabbed to death? Witherspoon? No, with a knife.

A pair of brothers walked into a bar. It was where the wake was being held from their mother's funeral.

Horse walks into a bar... Bartender says It's probably not a good idea that you're in here. You're a very large animal. Any sudden movements, you may injure somebody. I don't know why you're here. None of the glasses are ergonomically designed for you to drink from them. So, you should probably leave.

why shouldnt you throw a rock at a black person on a bike? Its probably your bike.

Fact: Nine out of ten Americans believe that out of ten people one will always disagree with the other nine.

have you seen stevie wonder's house. no? Well nethier has he you

A blond, burnette, and red head walk into a bar. They sit together and enjoy a few drinks while catching up on eachother's lives.

Why did Jimmy fall off the swing? He had no arms. Knock-knock Who's there? Not Jimmy

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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