Your girlfriend.

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What did the German girl say to me? entschuldigen Sie (excuse me)

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Are you 9/11 because i would like you to destroy my tower.

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What's a good way to kill time? It's impossible to kill an inanimate object.

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Are you black? Kill yourself.

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Why couldnt Helen Keller drive? Because She was Blind you sexist asshole

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How do you piss of camon? Have sex with shelby!

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What's Blue And Fat? A Brick. I like to lie a lot.

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WTF THINKING: "If you are going trough hell go back to where the path to hell began just get the fuck out of there you stupid dumbass muddaf0cker" "If you feel life is pushing you five steps back for each one you go forward, just turn your fucking back to your goal and you will get there in no time" "Never ever ever ever ever give up" -Fucking inspiring when you just give up after a certain number of "evers" "IT IS BETTER TO REIGN IN HEAVEN THAN TO SERVE IN HEAVEN!" "I forgot the rest" Nero the ONLY moralman (Fuck Neronism and they copying my shit, I am the only psychopath animal theRAPIST in town! (Female animals only, you think I am a pervert or something? Be ashamed you perverted deviant!)

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these guys im about to shoot owen,john,henry,shawn

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What is black and white and red all over? I don't know. I was hoping you did.

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Why did the black guy buy a jug of grape soda Because he was thirsty

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Why can't you hear a pterodactyl go to the bathroom? The Pterodactyl species became extinct 65 million years ago, and thus if you saw one today, you would be immediately taken into a mental hospital.

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What do you call a Harry Beaver? A beaver with lots of hair.

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What did the homosexual get for Christmas off his boyfriend? A lovely present off his loving partner.

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Your moma is so fat, that Jabba the Hutt says: "Damn!!!"

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Why did Helen Keller's dog run away? Someone left the gate open.

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How do you earn a bunch of money all at once? Walk into Hot Topic and say "I have knives for sale!"

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Why did the fat guy survive the the plane crash? He was late to get up due to a malfunctioning alarm clock and so missed his flight, sparing him of the tragic outcome the other passengers suffered. To this day he still thinks about how a completely random occurrence saved his life.

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How do you drown a blonde. I recommend that you do not drown a blonde because it is a felony. You could face 30-35 years in prison.

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What the flower say to the bird. Nothing

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why was the pen mad at the pencil? it wasnt. objects don't have feelings

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Billy Idol walks into a New York City Bar. He snorts lines of coke with his comrades in the bathroom and continues his night by having sex with attractive underage females

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What's better than winning the Special Olympics? ...Not being retarted.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

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