what did the tree say to the person? nothing trees cant talk

Your momma's so fat, when Jesus said, "Let there be light!," she had to scoot over.

Why did Sam have no friends? He was dead.

A black man walks into a bar. The bartender say, "Sorry, we don't serve your kind here." The man continues to order a drink when he realises the comment was directed at the elephant standind behind him.

What green and eats rocks? Grass, i lied about the rocks

Q:How come we have a black man in th white house? A: because we elected him

You know what's funny about Fox news? Nothing. Lying to the public isn't funny at all.

727-8088-954 Call Me. Say your name is Nick whether or not your a guy or a girl.

Why was 6 afraid of 7? 6 and 7 are non-living objects and cannot show fear or anger.

Your mom is so poor; she doesn't have a job.

What's the difference between an elephant and a grape? They're both purple. Except for the elephant.

A small mexican boy saves up enough money to buy his very own skateboard. His mother is dead.

a black man walks out of popeyes

How do you catch a predator? You throw a beartrap at a child.

roses are red, windows are clear, get off your ass and bring me a beer

What happened to the Chicken who crossed the road? It made it to the other side!

what did the boy with no arms and no legs get for christmas? Christmas presents.

Q: What do you call a dear with no eyes A: Nothing - call an animal cruelty service

What's 13 inches long and 3 inches wide and drives women crazy? My diick

I have a black friend that recently went to the doctor for a full checkup. I saw him today, and he we was dressed to the nines in a very expensive suit. "What's with the suit," I asked. "My doctor told me I'm impotent! So I thought, if I'm going to be impotent, then it'll be harder to attract a long term mate without the ability to give her children someday. So I've decided to showcase my impeccable taste in style to make up for it." He seemed really bummed out, so I gave him a hug and we went and had some ice cream.

Why did the chicken cross the road? Because he had very recentley made his escape from a nearby farm, of which was owned by a man close to dying of a Rhabdoid Tumor. His family was in mourn.

Why did the chicken cross the road? We will never know because he got hit by a car.

Why did the Jewish business man cross the road? A: to go to his reasonable paying job at a business.

A man asked Alexander the Great if he was gay, yet Alexander the Great was not offended. Why? Because "gay" has a rather different connotation than in the modern world than it did in earlier time periods where it meant "happy". Also, Macedonians, Alexander the Great's native people, did not speak English so he would not understand the question. Also Alexander the Great was gay in the sense that he was actually a homosexual.

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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