Why did the seagull fly over the sea, It had wings.

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What happened to the man who went to a strip bar? What happens to all of us. He died.

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joe: guess what. Bob: what. Joe: nothing I just wanted to talk

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What did the bank teller say after the man asked for a pen? Would you prefer black or blue?

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Whats the difference between a dog and a bird? They both fly

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A duck walks into a bar and asks for a beer. The bartender realizing this is an odd situation, seeing that ducks cannot articulate the English language, realizes he must be dreaming. He wakes up and turns to tell his wife about the dream, but she won't respond. He then realizes how his marriage is in shambles...

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What happened to the boy that got hit by a bus? He was by a 2nd bus, by which he felt no pain because the first bus crushed his lungs and skull causing suffocation and profuse hemorraging.

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What's the difference between a Jew and a Boy Scout? Boy Scouts come back from camp

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Roses are red, Violets are blue, Haiku doesn't rhyme, And neither does this

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Why did the Jew pick up the quarter on the sidewalk? Because he was going to buy a candy bar and was short 25 cents.

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What's the worst thing that can go wrong while trying to archieve something you desperately want? -Everything.

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Why couldn't the black man get his lawnmower to start? He was too poor to own a home =)

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360 NO SCOPE

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What is the difference between a woman and a whale? One has big whiskers and is fat and filthy, the other one lives in the sea and is a mammal

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So a man walks into a bar. Unfortunately, he had brittle bone disease, cracked open his skull and bled to death on the pavement.

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*Click* "Hello you have reached a pre-recorded voice at the suicide hotline. We regret to inform you that our consultant has suffered a recent bout of depression due to the sheer volume of calls he has received." "His body was found this morning, hanging from a tree." [L]

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Fight fire with with fire! That would be impossible, it'd just make the fire bigger. And probably kill you.

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LET'S PLAY CARDS SHUFFLE THE DECK *person with a deck-patio* no please don't

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Q: whats the difference between a t.v and a dead baby? A: i don't have a t.v in my garage

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What do you call a fish without an eye? A fsh

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Why was 6 afraid of 7? 7 was black.

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If the shoe fits....... its probably your size.

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A man, a woman and their child wen to a restaurant. There was a horse in it and they left. The Holocaust begun

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What do you call a puppy with all it's legs missing? Franklin, the quadraplegic puppy.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

Anti-Joke Triceratops