- Anti Joke

Jesus walks into a hotel, slams four nails down on the counter, and says, "Put me up for the night!" The concierge looks at him and says, "You're not Jesus. Jesus was brutally murdered approximately 1,970 years ago. And although I may not be a believer, his teachings have brought comfort and solace to millions of people around the world. Nor do we accept nails as payment. Please remove yourself from the premises or I will call security."

Why did the first monkey fall out of the tree? He died! Why did the second monkey fall out of the tree? He was attached to the first! Why did the third monkey fall out of the tree? He thought it was a game! Why did the fridge fall out of the tree? The branch broke! Why did Sally fall off her bike? She got hit by three monkeys and a fridge!

Q: what did the emo girl use to check her email? A: A computer.

Hamsters are a lot like cigarettes. They're completely harmless until you put one in your mouth and light it on fire.

A: Rock! B:Paper! C: Siccorz! D: Shoot! D: Jimmy, you alright buddy? I didn't mean for that bullet to hit you man..

Why did the chicken cross the road? Because it looking for food for it was starving to death.

yo mammas so fat when she gets cut gravy pours out

two kids see a girl naked in the woods They walk away promptly to their homes and tell their mothers.

Yo' Mommas so poor, She has to ask close family friends and relatives for money so she can feed you.

What did the taxi driver say when the black man got in to his taxi? Where to sir?

Why did Elsa go into hiding. She died

an 80 yr old man apllies to walmart

How many Japanese people does it take to make a whirlpool? - None, because they're all dead.

What's the thing that freaks guys out the most? When you're about to have sex with a girl and it turns out she had a penis and it's bigger than yours

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK! Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

Want more? You might be interested in...

Anti-Joke Chicken

Anti-Joke Triceratops

What did the three best friends say to eachother? We are all best friends

How do you wake up Lady Gaga? I don't know, I've never tried to.

What did hitler get for christmas??? Roughly 3 million dead jews in the ashtray

What do you do when you see a black man with half a head? Stop laughing and reload

How do Yankees fans cheer for their favorite sports team? Let's go Yankees!

Why was the boy seeing stars? It was night time.

Why do eggs come in 12? because 13 is bad luck

What's Red and bad for your teeth? A Brick

What do you call a blonde who passed the SAT's? An excellent student.

my computer teacher just left the room. teehee JLR