Q.Why did the chicken cross the road? A.The chicken was very distressed and trying to get away from the angry mob that followed close behind it.The chicken was never seen again. If you see a distressed chicken please contact your local police station.

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Magic! Well not really, you see, people that are stressed have the tendency to remain far longer into the state of hypnosis because their body conciously and subconciously (I am typoing it, but I cant bother to type it correctly fuck it) seek out the state of peace that hypnosis gives more often. Anyway, I know another thing that helps relieve stress, cough... Now, did you know that if you push your nose upwards slightly, you will feel a finger between your legs? its because nerve endings are connected that way, give it a go.

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What's the difference between a book. A tree's leaves hit the trash cans

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Why does the boy like ice-cream? It tastes good.

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Haikus are easy, But sometimes they don't make sense. Refrigerator.

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cory

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What is black and white and can't fit through a revolving door? A nun with a harpoon through her back.

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girl. have you seen my duck man. yes he is with me right now girl rely you have him man. yes in my diner girl. d.i.c.k. man.f u

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How do you stop a bus? You don't, and Regina George didn't either.

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Person: Hello Parking Meter! Parking Meter: Hello! The person then backed away in fear

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Why did Sally fall off the swing? Sally had no arms. Knock knock. Whose there? Not Sally.

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A man approaches an attractive young woman at a party. He asks her if a rag smells like chloroform and proceeds to hold the rag up to her face. She passes out, the man takes her into a nearby bedroom and rapes her. He casually leaves the party. He will most likely continue this vile act for years to come.

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Why did the Catholic Priest get arrested? Tax-evasion.

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Why'd the chicken cross the road? After losing its family, the chicken had became an adrenaline junkie and enjoyed the rush of doing such dangerous things. It subsequently became addicted to opium.

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trump and hillary are both stranded on an island, who survives? america

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why was the man afraid of the tree? Because it ate his mother!!!!!!

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Why didn't the door open? Because it was locked

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Why did the little boy drop his ice cream? He got hit by a bus

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A Muslim walks into a Bar, He buys everyone a round of drinks and enjoys the rest of his night

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What is the meaning of life? Bill Gates: Windows Donald Trum: Money Some poor kid:luck and rich parents.

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Three men walk into a bar. One of them is not planning to consume alcohol because they are responsible and he is the designated driver.

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What's 9+10? 19.

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What's white and looks like paper? Paper.

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Whats worse than losing your phone? Buying a new one and then losing that

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

Anti-Joke Triceratops