Two girls are in a car together. The one in the drivers seat is texting while driving. The girl in the passengers seat notices this and tells her the she should put it away in case of a risk of a collision. She apologizes and puts it away and the two of them drive to the store unharmed and continued their normal day.

Q. what is black ans white and red all over A. a shot to death zebra

The last joke I tried to submit used "trolololol" as the enter code thing and I spelled it without the extra "lol" The lolz have got me again *this time it asked me for "basket case"

Whats blue and fuzzy? Blue fuzz. Whats pink and fuzzy? Blue fuzz that's embarrassed.

What do you call putting a toad in the microwave? Animal cruelty.

What does the lifeguard do on his free time? Ejaculate.

Roses are Red, Violets are Blue, I've got a shotgun, Give me the money.

Why are black people so good at basketball? Hard work and dedication.

What do you call a man who's a gynecologist, painter and respected martial arts champion? Talented.

What do you call a shop dedicated to selling rap music, watermelons, grape soda and fried chicken? A poor business model

Why was the protester on the floor? Because the protest had become a riot, and police brutality is a serious issue.

"Roll back into the kitchen and imagine me a sandwich!" yelled the abusive husband to his paraplegic wife.

Why did the little girl fall from the swing? She's got no arms.

I was eating a sandwich when someone came up to me and said "sharing is caring" So I gave him a grenade He asked "where's the pin" I said " I pulled it for you" This is not an anti joke

why was the white girl not wanting to have a baby with her boyfriend he was black

What day is it today? It's "Jack Daniels Day" according to that guy with the shopping cart filled with kittens.

There was a curtain who sneezed and then asked you for a tissue. He was in a room with two chairs a coffee table and a 37 year old bookcase, why did he sneeze???? Because he had a cold!!????

Whatever tomorrow brings, I'll be there. Just kidding because today brought terminal cancer.

telll someone to ask u if u are a tree then say nooooooo

Why did the director call cut? Because he was shot dead by Nazis.

A black man walks into a bar. The bartender says, "We don't serve you kind here." The black man says, "Is it because I'm black?" The bartender replies, "Yes."

a man walks into a bar... he was shot to death because he was a slave during the 1910s

A drunk walks out of a bar gets in his car and proceeds to drive home the driver passed out at the wheel swerved in the wrong lane and smashed the car of the Jefferson family a young family of 4, the Jefferson family's car exploded into flames while the drunk sat back laughed and rubbed the wound on his head

Who was at the door when Helen Keller answered? She doesn't know

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

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