what did the teacher say to his student? do your work.

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How many mentally challenged beings does it take to screw in a light bulb? Well one couldn't do it so adding more to the equation will only make it worse sir.

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I beheld M.Bison/Raul Julia, as I fell down from the sky LIKE LIGHTNING! Your friendly r*pist Moral Man: You don`t like me? MAAN That gets me on... As for Horny, I was born with two of them... The third is a burning stake. ...So you like me... Meh! No fun when they don`t struggle nor squeal, even if they do scream in pain...

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Yo mamma so fat that when she gets in bed she gets sleepy

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Why did the kid hide under the table? There was an earthquake.

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How can you tell if your wife is dead? She won't have a pulse.

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PENIS :)

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A Jew, an atheist, and an Asian man walk into a bar. They all have a drink and then go home to their families

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what do you call a monkey? a monkey

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how do you crash a party? You dont because that would be rude.

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What's blue, wriggles around, and sits in a corner? A dying baby in a plastic bag. What's green, doesn't wriggle around, and sits in a corner? A Christmas tree. The current homeowners were never made aware of the atrocity committed by the previous occupants.

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i killed a blind guy when he wasnt looking

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Your mom is so ugly she often finds it difficult attracting members of the other sex.

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Women's rights

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Whats worse than biting into an apple and finding half a worm? Biting into another apple and finding the other half

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pobody's nerfect

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You are walking down the street. You see 3 black people and you don't talk to them because they are complete strangers.

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Did you hear about the guy who got run over? Me neither

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Once soon a time there was a boy named steven. He dropped his ice cream because... You know the rest

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Say the line below all very fast to get sudden strange sensation... Magic-ish. I like to find threes and peel of their... BARK BARK BARK BARK BARK BARK BARK BARK BARK BARK... ...BARKBARK BARK BARK BARK BARK! Done? Now sit Down, have a little treat Good boy/girl! :Look well at the sun, the jagged Blackness will consume all, Your little star forever but a ever fading memory.

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Why did Jimmy fall off the swing? He had no arms. Knock knock. Who's there? Certainly not Jimmy.

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Knock knock. Who's there? John. Oh, OK I'll be there in a sec. *opens door* Did you bring the blender and the baking tray? Oh no I forgot I'll run back and get them.

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Knock Knock. Who's there? (knocker runs for life).

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Roses are red, Violets are blue, Today I'll wear a hat on my head Instead of a shoe.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

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