Mommy, why did daddy leave? Because you touch yourself at night sweetie.

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What is my cats favorite college? Harvard

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what would george washington do if he was alive today? he would scream and scratch his coffiin

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ive got it ive got ive got outsimers to tonight wow bim bim bub bub za za

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What do you call a black man being raped by 6 members of the Ku Klux Klan? Rape

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women and girls can really get enjoyment out of sex. it's not really about controlling the man.

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Knock, Knock. Lol jk, we all know knock knock jokes fricken suck.

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What do Richard and Judy have in common? Nothing.

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What happenes if you put an elephant in the fridge? Nothing, it wouldnt fit.

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A blonde, a redhead and a brunette were on an island. There were loads of other people too - the UK is a pretty popular place to live.

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A black man and a mexican man are in a car. Who is driving? The cop. The two men were best friends who had taken a month off from working in their law firm. The mexican man, Alex, had recently gone through a divorce and John decided to take him on a trip backpacking across Europe. Rain had suddenly come upon them and a passing off-duty police officer had picked them up and took them to a nearby hotel. The three men had drinks and the friends had a wonderful rest of their trip. Alex, however never got over Jenny leaving him. 3 months after their return John found him dead in his home by auto-erotic asphyxiation.

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One night a policewoman pulls over a drunk driver. She politely asks him to step out of his car. He willingly does so. She says, "Anything you say can and will be Held against you." He replies "BREASTS."

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Your Mama's so fat that the Doctor recommended a healthy eating diet, and to exercise daily.

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We can consider a wind turbine as a great ventilator that produces heat.

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Charlie Sheen Walks Into a Rehab Center.....

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Why is six afraid of seven? Because seven has an extra penis

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What do you call an giraffe? Well, you should probably call it a giraffe if you want people to think you are literate and know your grammar.

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Roses are red. Violets are blue. I'm gonna f*ck you with a rake.

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What happens when you give someone a free chocolate bar? ThEeyroast it and vapourise it intheir hands....no they eat it

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what do you call a dog with not legs? it doesn't matter what you call it, its not coming

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What's red and bad for your teeth? A brick

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How many amish does it take to change a lightbulb? Presumably only one, but since they do not generally use electricity it has yet to be tested.

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How do you get your sister to stop wearing your underwear? Throw up on her.

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What did the farmer say when the potatoes were ready for harvest? The potatoes are ready for harvest.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

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