Why did the boy have pink skin at night? Because he did not put on a sufficient amount of sunscreen that morning.

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What the difference between some stoned and someone drunk? When your drunk you think having a good time even when you not and when you stoned your so high you think your a dragon ball z character.

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N-E Pats never cheated

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can you touch your toes? no

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What's funnier than diarrhoea? Cancer What's funnier than cancer? The holocaust

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"Knock knock." "Who's there?" "Chuck Norris." "Chuck Norris who?" "NOBODY SAYS 'CHUCK NORRIS WHO'!!!"

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Q. What do you call a gay bar with no bar stools? A. A gay bar

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Roses are red, violets are blue, why am i even talking to you?

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Why did the chicken cross the road? To save his failing marriage.

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in a car crash an entire family is killed from death until they all die

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What did one muffin say to the other muffin? Nothing, because they weren't made. Cupcakes were made instead. Sorry, Muffins.

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Why did the chicken cross the road? Because he was at a crosswalk and the walk light was on.

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Why was the boy sick? Because he accidently ate his own feces.

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An incoming freshman introduces himself to his Ethics professor by saying, "What's up?" To which the professor responds, "You should never end a sentence with a preposition." The freshman, who is both clever and witty, quickly responds to his future Professor, saying: "Professor, I practice linguistic description, such that I observe language objectively in a way that does not adhere strictly to grammatical and syntactic dogma". The professor, surprised by the student's philosophical disposition, engages the student in a highly constructive dialogue about the philosophy of language, from which both the student and teacher learn more about each other and themselves.

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A black man walks into KFC. the whole room..THE GAME.

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knock knock! who is there? its knock! knock who??? knock knock... who is there.... i told you its knock... knock who??? knock knock... WHO IS THERE!! OMG I TOLD YOU ITS KNOCK! KNOCK WHO!! WHO IS KNOCK! KNOCK KNOCK OMG WTF! HOLY SHIT WHO IS THERE! ITS KNOCK WE HAVE KNOWN EACH OTHER OUR WHOLE LIVES! KNOCK WHO?? KNOCK KNOCK WHY DONT YOU REMEMBER ME! oh knock knock from next door! who is there???? jk.. knock...knock......omg put down the gun knock knock stop i love you knock its not worth it!! NO KNOC!!! GUNSHOT* KNOCK NOOOOO!!! I LOVED YOU SOMEONE CALL 911!! OMG KNOCK WHY!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!! OH KNOCK WHY!!!!

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A man walks into a bar, I forget the rest of this joke and your mother's a whore.

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how many baby's does it take to paint a wall? Depends on how hard you throw them

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Your mama is so fat, we are all seriously concerned about her health.

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What is white and hard to catch? A refrigerator

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I just flew in from Seattle, and boy is their airport difficult to navigate.

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What's worse than a bee sting? A katon.

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Why wasn't Abraham Lincoln a good president? Because he got shot in the head and died.

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why was the jew shaking hands with a nazi? they realized their differences and were bonding.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

Anti-Joke Triceratops