Roses are red, Violets are blue, I wanted tobe cool, But I look like you

Pooring urine into your eyes, is a natural way to cure pink eye. Found this out this morning.

A teenage boy is getting ready to take his girlfriend to prom. First he goes to get a tux but there's a long tux line at the shop and it takes forever. Next, he hast to get some flowers so he goes to a florist and there is a huge flower line there. It takes forever but he gets the flowers. Next he heads to get a limo, unfortunately there is a long limo line at the rental office and it takes a long time but he gets the job done. Finally the day of the prom comes and the two are dancing happily and are having a good time. When the song is over she asks him to get her some punch, so he heads over to the punch table and there is no punchline.

What made Qtip's so dangerous? Q-tip's music

What did the alphabetical soup spell for little Bobby? U gOt SUzie prEgnant ....... aGaiN

A black man a white man and an asian man walk into a bar have a few drinks and on thier drive home run over a three year old little girl and here to month old sister and they go to prison for the rest of thier lives (they shouldn't of let the asian drive)

Did you hear about that guy? He had a wonderful morning.

What is red and has wheels? Grass, I lied about it being red and having wheels.

Why did the Titanic sink, even though people said it was unsinkable? Grit and determination.

Why did the sperm swim back? cos he realised that he was in someones anus!

What do you call the branch of Science that separates the organism's race? RACISM

Why was the blonde sad? Her phone was broken due to an NNEMP.

Cleavlin has a shmaaala dik

I dream of a world where chickens can cross the road and not have their motives questioned.

Why did the hipster get burned? Because he was a volunteer fireman.

So a guy walks into a bar and says, "I can hold a spoon in between my butt-cheeks." Jillian Michaels asked him if that will help him lose weight.

Why didn't he finish his

Why did the chicken cross the road? Because he has two legs

The optimist sees the glass as half full. The pessimist sees the glass as half empty. The average American sees a half-finished glass of water that is not flavored and is therefore is not worth any reasonable person's time.

What are the similarities between aaron ash and a cow? they both have 7 stomachs.

KNOCK! KNOCK! who knocks like that? all my friends break the door down...oh alright then ill answer i guess WHO IS IT? THE REAPER oh s*** dude! [panic face] NO ONES HOME? "In other news tonight, 2 local men found murdered in their living rooms, after looking up common joke style called anti joke. Police say the door was smashed in an obvious sign of forced entry. They seem to have just mysteriously had sudden heart attacks and fainted. heh heh...hey nancy....why did the chicken cross the road? [=< heh heh" "y" "because he thouroughly enjoyed darting out into traffic" "HAHAHAHAHAHAHA *GASP!* X.x dead face "NANCY! NANCY!.....well in other OTHER news ive just murdered nancy, and thats no joke." *runs*

Why did the Jewish cross the road? He didn't he died in Holocaust.

why did the homosexual man cross the road? to get to his gay partner.

Justin Port#$ falls out of a tree. What happens? he breaks his neck and unfortually dies a long painful death.

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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