John walked up to his dad one morning and shouted, "Dad, it's my birthday!" Dad said, "Cool, how old are you?" John says, "I'm seven!" Dad tells him to go downstairs and tell his grandpa. Johnny runs down and says, "Grandpa, it's my birthday, guess how old I am!" Grandpa sticks his? hand in John's pants and sticks his thumb into his anus. As he pulls his hand out, he pinches his penis. Grandpa says, "You're seven." John says, "How did you know?" Grandpa says, "I heard you tell your dad upstairs."

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Roses are red, Potatoes are yellow, ERMAHHHGERDDD PERRDERRRDERRR

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Why was the Pizza Delivery boy crying? He was sad.

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What does a lonely man do on opposite day? I don't know. Why should we know what he does, that is both weird and illegal. Stalking is a serious crime and should not be used. We do not know what he does on normal days, thus we cannot come to a conclusion to this question. However, I do hypothesize that he must be social on this day because this is the opposite of lonely.

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Why was the little girl not allowed to see the pirate movie? It was sold out.

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Many men trespass on my property to taste my milk based beverages. They insist that it's quality is superior to yours. I could teach you how to make such milk based beverages, but I would have to levy a fee.

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Like is like a penis long and easy. But women make it hard

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What's worse than finding a worm in your apple? Getting raped by your great grandma

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Why are anti-jokes funny? They are not because they have no punchline and if you wern't a complete dumbass you would have the ability to read the description on the right off the page.

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What did Voldermort say to harry potter? i raped you mum last night!

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your mom is so fat jesus couldnt even lift her spirits

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I was sitting in traffic the other day. I was runover.

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Kony 2012 - Uganda Be Kidding Me

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Rebecca Black walks into a bar she took the back seat

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Why is sally sad her parents abuse her daily

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What did the Muslim do when he got on the bus? He realized he was in the wrong place and got on a plane and blew it up.

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Why are black people black? They're not. They're brown you idiot.

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I was going to write a racist joke but there was too many black people watching me.

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What's the Green Lantern's favorite holiday? Hannukah

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Your mommas so stupid she put a quarter into a parking meter and waited for a gumball to drop out.

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What do you give a sick bird? Tweetment.

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Hey you know what? What? Never mind.

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What is red and hangs around the back of a train? A miscarriage.

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Hey I Just Met You , & This Is Crazy , But Here's My Status , So Like It Maybe ?

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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