Where do baby apes sleep? In apricots

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i like my coffee like i like my women ... with big titis

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Roses are red Violets are blue i have a gun get in the van

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Y R U A B? I don't know why I am a bee.

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what is red, yellow, green, blue, purple, and violet? Blood i lied about the other colors...

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what do you call a baby with no arms and no legs in a mailbox? a horriffic murder

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Chuck Norris once stared in a show called Walker: Texas Ranger.

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Why did William commit suicide? Because his grandmother had recently died of terminal cancer. His mother left him on the front step when he was two, and moved to Tennessee with her baby daddy.

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Why did Suzie fall out of her swing? Because she had no arms.

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You you you you you you you you you you you you you you you you you you you you you you you you you you you you you you you you you you you you you you you you you you you you you you you you you you you you you you you. Way do go lazy you didn't read all the you's so you didn't realize there was a yoo in there. But now you realize there aren't any yoo's there way to go.

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what did one apple say to another apple nothing apples cant talk

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What's a fun place to visit on the weekend? Uranus.

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whats long and black on a black guy slavery

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What's green and has wheels? The Holocaust. I lied about everything.

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A man with a badly injured arm is sitting in a hospital. He says, "Doctor, when my arm heals, will I be able to play the violin?" The doctor says, "Yes, with proper medical attention and rest, you will be able to." The man says, "That's great! Before I was hurt, I really enjoyed playing the violin."

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Ten years ago we had Steve Jobs, Bob Hope and Johnny Cash ... now we have no Jobs, no Hope and no Cash.

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Roses are red, Violets are blue, This poem doesnt rhyme And your entire family died trying to fly to your house for Christmas. They crashed into a orpanage for death children. There were no survivors.

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If Chuck Norris and Bruce Lee got in a fight, who would win? Chuck Norris, since Bruce Lee is dead.

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Q:Why did Hitler lose World War II? A:His "gas" bill.

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What do you call it when you have sex with a black man? Sex

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What did the old man say when those damn kids stepped on his lawn? Nothing one of those kids killed him around three years back....

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Why did the chicken cross the road? He had no conscience and therefore was not able to backup the very reason that he crossed the road.

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Ask me if I'm a truck. Are you a truck? No.

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What's black and dangerous? A fridge, I lied about the black part.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

Anti-Joke Triceratops