Your momma is so fat that she decided to begin an exercise program and eat healthy and she lost weight.

thumb_up thumb_down -32

every man comes from between a women's legs for the rest of their lives they try to get back in

thumb_up thumb_down -32

whats worse than a baby impaled on your lawn... the universe being consumed by a giant albino ape with over sized testicles

thumb_up thumb_down -32

Roses are red my name is dave this poem makes no bloody sense microwave

thumb_up thumb_down -32

Your muma is so ugly she went to a ugly competition and got kicked out "no pros aloud".

thumb_up thumb_down -32

One day a man discovered he could suck his own penis. Unfortunately he was heterosexual and could derive no pleasure from doing so as he was acutely aware of the fact he had a penis in his mouth.

thumb_up thumb_down -32

What happens when Terran Hansen has sex with a cow? Jesse Z.

thumb_up thumb_down -32

Stephen Hawking can walk

thumb_up thumb_down -32

what is the worst thing a bout four black men driving a Cadillac off a cliff? they were my friends

thumb_up thumb_down -32

how do you get a clown off a swing i dont know but dont call suzy

thumb_up thumb_down -32

What's worse than a real joke on AntiJoke? The Holocaust

thumb_up thumb_down -32

So a man is in a car smoking weed when he forgets to crack a window so he over doses and dies. The car crashes and he kills 3 other people.

thumb_up thumb_down -32

Remember that part where Jesus gets angry at a fig three and kills it because it "was lazy" for refusing to grow figs at winter? Brother Jeez, that was kinda mean man! You know it was winter rite? Anti Joke or not, that part is funny, so if Jesus returns and wants you to make him a sammich you better go get that goddamn sammich!

thumb_up thumb_down -32

What did the cannibal order at McDonalds? Big Mac, extra pickle, hold the mayo.

thumb_up thumb_down -32

Knock knock. Who's there? Screw! Screw who? Screw you.

thumb_up thumb_down -32

"Horse walks into a bar... Bartender says It's probably not a good idea that you're in here. You're a very large animal. Any sudden movements, you may injure somebody. I don't know why you're here. None of the glasses are ergonomically designed for you to drink from them. So, you should probably leave."

thumb_up thumb_down -32

Why did the dinosaurs go extinct? Because you touch yourself at night.

thumb_up thumb_down -32

theres this guy that i REALLY like but today he was putting something in my locker, it was gumbie the little green bendy thing but i didnt want it to be in my locker so i slammed my locker, except the only thing was that his pinky was in the way!!!! oh gosh i felt soooooo bad!!!! turns out he went to the hostpital and got stitches!!!!!!! that made it worse on me!!!!!! he said he was finee but i still cant let that go!!!!!

thumb_up thumb_down -32

roses are red violets are blue i am black and so r u

thumb_up thumb_down -32

why didn't the boy go to school because he died last night

thumb_up thumb_down -32

They see me trollin' They hatin'...

thumb_up thumb_down -34

why did the chicken cross the road............ why dont you tell me smartass

thumb_up thumb_down -34

why did the skeleton drop his juice? Because he has no stomach LOLOLOLOLOLOLOLOLO

thumb_up thumb_down -34

Why was 6 afraid of 7? Because 7 was black.

thumb_up thumb_down -34

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

Want more? You might be interested in...


Anti-Joke Chicken

Anti-Joke Triceratops