You can pick your nose and you can pick your friends but you can't wipe your friends on the couch.

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Jesus walks into a church only to be touched inappropriately.

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A:Wanna hear a joke? B: Sure A: A joke

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why did the chicken cross the road? because he was trying to kill himself in the fastest and easiest way due to his drinking problems, which in the first place separated him him from his wife, who is fighting with him in court for custody of there only child ,Steven. He can not even pay the rent on his apartment or hold a job to pay child support..he is also in debt.

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Why did Johnny throw the clock out the window? His parents are never around to supervise him.

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How many orangoutangs does it take to screw in a light bulb? 16; mongoloid

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What is James Miller's real name? James Miller.

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I have a phone, Don't know where it's at, Forever Alone FAPFAPFAP

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Q: How do you fit 30 Jews in one car? A: Two in the front, two in the back, and the rest in the ash tray.

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There once was a man from Duluth who's never did rhyme. They were often too short.

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Why did the chicken cross the road? It didn't know any better. It very recently was decapitated in order tofeed the farmers family.

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A man walks into a bar and wakes up in the hospital with a mild concussion.

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What did Batman say to Superman before they got in the car? Get in the car.

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A man walks into a bar After months of rehab he is giving in to his drinking abuse again and will ruin his life as well as his family

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i committed murder

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How do you confuse a blonde? I guess the same way you confuse someone of any other hair color.

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What do you tell your dad if he constantly gripes about his balls? He's got testicular cancer and he's going to die a horrible painful death.

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Why couldn't the young african american read? He was born blind

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COME HERE, POTTER!!!! NOW!!! Instead of agreeing to approach the source of the rather hostile summoning, Potter decided to sit down and eat a healthy vegetarian lunch of sausages and chips.

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Vote this up

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why was the female student failing out of school? because she made bad choices and never gave school her all.

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why did the chicken cross the road? becuase he needed to get to the other side and he was using a crosswalk

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A kid had wild unprotected sex. He didn't get an STD or enpregnate the girl.

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Why did the little boy fall down the stairs? I pushed 'em.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

Anti-Joke Triceratops