Q: why was the cat naked? A: its owner was drunk and thought he was shaving his own head.

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Knock Knock. Who's there? Your roommate, I forgot my keys.

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So, two men walk into a bar. But the midget walks under it.

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Why am I telling you this joke? Because the person who did it before me mentioned that he enterted this, agreed to the Terms of Service and clicked submit - but missed out that he also typed in the capcha. Mine said: never quit.

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25.

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What did the doctor say to the other doctor? Hey bill

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Why did the Jewish man bend down to pick up a penny? Because he had dropped it and required the penny as part of his payment for his food.

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shut up elliot

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So there was a jewish guy, a black guy, and a white guy all sky diving. They all had an amazing time and they all went to a bar later to talk about what they just had experienced.

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How do you kill a red elephant? You can't red elephants don't exist.

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9/11.

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How do you get a elephant in a fridge? You open the fridge and put it in. How do you get a Rhino in a fridge? You take the elephant out and then put the rhino in. All the animals in the animal kingdom are at a meeting, what animal isn't there? The rhino, his in the fridge. How do you cross a river full of alligators? Walk across the allligators are at the meeting.

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Why did the chicken cross the road? I don't know chickens are absent minded creatures that can aimlessly walk around.

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What do you call a man with a spade in his head? ...An innocent, family orientated murder victim.  X

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my mind's eye?

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Why was Timmy crying? Because he got raped in a van

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What's black and white and red all over? A bloody fight between a black and a white man.

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How did the little boy get lost? He didnt he got dragged into a van and was raped violently.

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What did the boy with no arms get for Christmas? A gameboy

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Why did the squirrel fall out of the tree? - Because it died.

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Why can't Osama bin Laden make anymore terrorist attacks? He's dead.

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Why did a 36 year old Asian man stop in the middle of raping someone A: He realized that what he was doing was immoral and that it could scar someone for the rest of there lives and that he could serve a sentence of up to 35 years which would mean he would miss out on the special offers that QVC has to offer during this time

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What has four legs and can fall out of a tree and kill someone? A pool table.

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If life gives you lemons, keep them because hey, free lemons

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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