Just the other day there was a house, and unforunatly Bob was a burn victim, the doctors said that he would have had a slow and excruciatingly painful death... Luckily he was already dead!

Knock knock Who's there? Prosti Prosti who? Prostitute

How do you get a baby to stop crying? Shoot it.

Why did Helen Keller's dog run away Because no dog likes being called "hurrrrdhjkdhjsaklhdkhjkddssaduyiwqkhdbewcjk"

How do chinese people call the firemen? By phone.

Why did the boy bring a ladder to school? He is short and finds it difficult getting from place to place.

If Miley Cyrus has the ability to come in like a wrecking ball, how come she can't twerk?

A caar pllus itno a graege. You are probably dyslexic.

Ebola

Want to hear a dirty joke? Well... I can't tell you. It's inapropriate.

Oh, well if you want, I would like for you to tell her that I wish her good health, suddenly it sounds like I am speaking with spider man here, so you could balance on the top of a tower like a ninja and stuff?

Why did the chicken cross the road? He was attempting to get back to his farm.

Why did the black lady pick out a white dress? Because she thought it was a pretty white dress.

bangers and mash?

A man walks into a bar,gets a drink, and then leaves.

What's awesome and looks like a pumpkin? An awesome pumpkin.

So a blonde walks into a wall...

What do two Mexicans call a stray cat? Gato

You know whats worse than an anti-joke? Practically Anything.

An Asian man walked to P.F. Changs, and asked where the bathroom is.

why was the white girl not wanting to have a baby with her boyfriend he was black

i like having monkeys lick peanut butter off my nipples

Why is it when birds fly in a "V" shape one side is longer? There's more birds on that side.

A horse walks into a bar and the bartender asks "Why the long face?" The horse replies, "I have AIDS".

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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