- Anti Joke

What is bloody and has two legs? Half of a cat.

Why did the guy to the moo moo cow say? Yesterday, I took a crap at the restaurant and the toilet got stuck so I stole the vehicle and won the lottery.

Why was the boy crying? His mother has terminal cancer, and his father does not have the financial stability to cover the cost of the surgery and keep up on house payments and buying clothes and food for the children. He will be living in a foster home in a matter of a week.

Why couldn't Jimmy ride his bike? Jimmy was a goldfish.

I got pussies, cocks, asses and bitches. In my animal store.

Q: What do you say to someone who makes fun of you and is bigger than you? A: Nothing, you just punch him in the toe and run away

What do you call a guy that just shit himself? Me

Why did the orange cross half way across the road Because it ran out of juice

What do you say when you see your tv floating at night? Drop it, nigga!!

Knock knock. Who's there? IRS. Youre being audited, Sir.

what goes round , and round , and croaks? a blender in a frog.

Guess what? What? Your dog is dead.

Q: Why did the crazy man stare at the orange juice container? A: Because it started talking.

what happened to the man who got stuck in a car after a crash? the ambulance failed to arrive and he died a slow, trajic death.

Q #1: Why did Sally fall off the swings? A #1: She has no arms. Q #2: Knock Knock Who's There? Not Sally.

Have you ever heard of a goose?

penis haha

A: Hi I am a Mormon B: I know I'm one of your wifes

What's black and white and red all over? A mime that got hit by a truck.

Why did the heroin addict get staff infection? His skin broke open multiple times without proper cleansing.

What would you find if you shaved chuck norris's beard? A chin.

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Two Muffins in an oven One muffin looks at the other muffin and says: "Oohhhh it's hot in here!". Then the other muffin says: "Oohhhh a talking muffin!"

Why did the man buy fruits at the store? Because they were available, on sale, and the man was hungry, so he wanted to eat fruit at that time, he then got into his car, but thought to himself first, "I should unlock my car so I can open the door," so he does so, and sits in the drivers seat eating his fruit, he drives off to his home, arrives safely, and greets his family as he enters the house, then they sit down, eat dinner, and go to sleep, the next day, the man goes to the store, and buys vegetables

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

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NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK! Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

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