Jesus walks into a hotel, slams four nails down on the counter, and says, "Put me up for the night!" The concierge looks at him and says, "You're not Jesus. Jesus was brutally murdered approximately 1,970 years ago. And although I may not be a believer, his teachings have brought comfort and solace to millions of people around the world. Nor do we accept nails as payment. Please remove yourself from the premises or I will call security."

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Q: Who was the best Jewish cook? A: Hitler.

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what did one deer say to the other? nothing, he was shot during hunting season.

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A man jumped off a bridge. He went bungee jumping with his family and had a great time.

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Why did the woman step away from the kitchen? To pick up her paraplegic son, who had fallen.

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Knock knock. Who's there- oh wait, I don't care. Get away from my house or I am going to call the police.

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What's the difference between difference and between? One is difference the other is between.

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ROSES ARE RED VIOLETS ARE BLUE I LIKE TITS TITS

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Why isn't this joke funny? Because it has no point.

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Roses are red Violets are blue Some poems rhyme But this one doesn't

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Roses are Red, I have a phone, Nobody texts me, Forever alone.

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SBB

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If X = 3 and Y = 7, what is X + Y = ? It doesn't matter. You forgot to put your name on the test which means you got an automatic fail.

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What do you call an asian pilot? A pilot you racist bastard

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Why did the boy scratch his back? A:because it was itchy.

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What's the difference between a black man and and a bag of crap? A lot, but mostly the bag

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A man gets hit by a car. His family is sad and plans a funeral.

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Tilt your screen back

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What happened when the ugly girl asked her crush out on a date? He said yes. He found her personality quite attractive

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A white man is running away from a black man. Because they are Playing tag. A gaming involving to touch the other person

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What did Sally get for Christmas? Who's Sally?

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Why did nobody bother to help the old lady cross the road? Because her actions in recent years had given rise to considerable division and ill-feeling within the community.

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whats polish and black a polish black person

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What do you do when you see a black man with half a head? Stop laughing and reload

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

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