why did the chicken cross the road? because he wanted to!

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Two guys walk into a bar; A Mexican and a Canadian. The Mexican guy says "Bartender, give me a 2 shots of Tequila, por favor". The Canadian guy says "Bartender, give me a shot of Club and a Molson, eh". They continue to drink until neither can feel the crippling pain of their mundane lives - then they each leave the bar, walk home and sleep alone.

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A black man, a white man and an asian man jump off a building, which one will land first? Due to the equivalence principle, they will all land at the same time.

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I wondered why the baseball was getting bigger. But it wasn't actually getting bigger, it was just getting closer. So I got hit in the face.

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Q: What do people usually find funny? A: A joke.

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Knock knock. Whose there? Orange. Orange who? NOTHING, because NOTHING rhymes with orange!

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how do you tell a politician that you hate him? politicians can be female, too.

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How many black men does it take to change a light bulb? TO GET TO THE OTHER SIDE!

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What do communists and strawberries have in common? You can eat them.

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Person 1: Why do Jews have big noses? Person 2: Why? Person 1: No, I was asking you that question. Person 2: ??!!

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What's long and really hard? The fourth grade.

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What's the difference between a bicycle? An orange because it has no sleeves.

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Why did the little boy let go of his balloon? Because I was raping his face.

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Why couldn't the Egyptian pharaoh solve the Rubik's Cube? He didn't know how.

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Why was the boy late for dinner? He got in the van.

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A horse walks into a bar. The bartender says, "Why the long face?" The horse then precedes to beat the bartender voraciously for making fun of his religion.

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What do you get when you cross a joke with a rhetorical question?

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A potato walked into a bar and ordered a large bowl of french fries

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A priest and a rabbi walk into a gay bar. They are closet homosexuals and are searching for partners to engage in consensual sexual intercourse with.

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Why did the baby fall out of the trees? Cause it was dead.

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Roses are brown, Violets are brown, WHO THE HELL $#!T IN MY GARDEN?!

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An Asian walks into a bar. He has a few drinks, but makes sure not to have to many. He then drives home safely, and enjoys a good nights rest.

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Q. Why did the chicken cross the road? A. He was stapled to the baby.

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A pirate walks into a doctors office with ship's wheel attached to his crotch. Pirate: "Arrrrrr, do ya accept Kaiser Permanente?" Doctor: "Yes, but there's a $20 co-pay."

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

Anti-Joke Triceratops