How many dead babies does it take to paint a wall? First of all, babies do not have the physical ability or the mental capacity to ever paint a wall, no matter how many of them there are. Second of all, they are dead which probably will not increase their chances of painting said wall.

Whats orange and sounds like a parrot? a carrot

What is is one good thing about global Waming? Nothing.

what's black and white and red all over? a zebra in a blender

What do you call an arabic man who sells bombs for a living? A business man.

if dragonflies have purple toe nails, then how many pancakes does it take to build a doghouse? canada, because snakes don't have armpits!

Help i have fallen and i cannont get up Life alert life alert To bad just sit there we dont care

knock knock whos there steve i dont know you go away

What ended in the year 1970? 1969

Why did the man soil himself at his daughters wedding? Because he has an enlarged prostate and has trouble sitting down for long periods of time.

Why don't Vikings read the New York Times? Because they all died centuries ago. And none of them live in New York.

What did the girl with cancer get for her birthday? Hairspray.

What do you call a man running away from the bus? A man

Do you know why I'm bored???? No why are you bored Because I am

Q:What's better than getting 500 million dollars A:Nothing

What do you call a white person? Caucasian

Q. What happened to the girl who locked her keys in her car? A. I raped her.

Why didn't the boy get his mom anything for her birthday? He was killed by a drunk driver years ago

Guy- Wanna hear a joke about my dick? Nah, it's too long. Girl- Wanna hear a joke about my vagina? Nah, you'll never get it.

Why did the boy eat his homework? Because he was hungry. The teacher would stupid to say it was a piece of cake

A homeless guy gets done with his daily work. where does he go? nowhere he is homeless...

Velcro. What a rip off.

Sodium Sodium Sodium Sodium Sodium Sodium Sodium Sodium Sodium Sodium Sodium Sodium Sodium Sodium Sodium Sodium Sodium Sodium BATMAN! Oh cemetery jokes

Why did the chicken cross the road? Her frustrated farmer lured her with bread crums in hopes of retrieving his beloved chicken.

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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