How much wood would a wood-chuck chuck, If a wood chuck could chuck wood? A full study has never been commissioned into the amount of wood chucked by a groundhog and thus far remains an unknown quantity. ls

thumb_up thumb_down -9

An Italian leaves the mofia

thumb_up thumb_down -9

Q: Who followed E.T.A Hoffman? A: ASAP Rocky. (ETA and ASAP are both time-based abbreviations, ETA meaning 'estimated time of arrival' and ASAP meaning 'as soon as possible'. Thus, ASAP can form a response to a requested ETA. Additional humour comes from the dissonant occupations of the two individuals: E.T.A Hoffman being a nineteenth century gothic author, and ASAP Rocky being a modern rapper.)

thumb_up thumb_down -9

What Do You Call A Black Guy Surrounded By Nine White Guys With Bats? Jackie Robinson.

thumb_up thumb_down -9

Q:Wats worse then cutting ur lawn A: diarea on a sunday morning

thumb_up thumb_down -9

A man has had too many beers late at night. The bartender says "Sir, I'm going to have to cut you off"

thumb_up thumb_down -9

ask me if im a tree are you a tree? yes.

thumb_up thumb_down -9

-What did the old lady have for dinner? -Dementia

thumb_up thumb_down -9

A black man "walks into" a club. Several minutes later he is dead. The police, in a later press conference, refuse to admit that the club ever left the officer's belt.

thumb_up thumb_down -9

the midget went to the midget store

thumb_up thumb_down -9

What do you call a kid with no arms and an eye patch? Names.

thumb_up thumb_down -9

Why didnt timmy go to the party Mom said no

thumb_up thumb_down -9

Why did the Mexican jump the American border? Because he wanted a better paying job to support his family, and legal immagration to the States is a lengthy and highly difficult process.

thumb_up thumb_down -9

how many cookies did the fat kid eat? a perfectly reasonable amount of cookies.

thumb_up thumb_down -9

Q:Why was the blond so dumb A: She had downsidrome

thumb_up thumb_down -9

Your mother is so stupid that she had to study, a lot.

thumb_up thumb_down -9

What's the difference between humans and dogs? 4.

thumb_up thumb_down -9

A man is hungry so he gets on his coat and shouts : "I AM GOING TO THE STORE!". His wife says not to because the police say the rapist 'Eggman' is out again. He says he will be very careful. On his way he hears 'They are the Eggmen, I am the Eggmen-" and the man shouts: "AND I AM THE WAlRUS, SO GET THE HECK OUTTA MY FACE OR I WILL KOO-KOO KOO-JOOB YOU AND YOUR CHILDREN!" The Eggman and the man found two more people from Liverpool and formed the band 'The Beatles'. The Eggman shot the Walrus in 1980 after the band broke up.

thumb_up thumb_down -9

A: Knock, knock. B: Who's there? The writer of this joke had no idea how to end this.

thumb_up thumb_down -9

Mail Man: *Knocks on door* Guy & Girl: WHAT?! *laughing* Mail Man: Mail! Guy & Girl: Hold on she is almost done with the whip cream.

thumb_up thumb_down -9

Why is Justin Bieber gay? Justin is attracted to the female gender

thumb_up thumb_down -9

XD Jackass.

thumb_up thumb_down -9

i walk into a bar,and then proceed to be taken out because i am a minor -chuckles

thumb_up thumb_down -9

Did you hear the one about the man who went into the jungle wearing nothing but leopard print underwear? He was suffering from psychogenic fugue disorder and had no idea who or where he was. He was eventually eaten alive by a flesh-eating centipede. When his wife found out, she committed suicide.

thumb_up thumb_down -9

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

Want more? You might be interested in...


Anti-Joke Chicken

Anti-Joke Triceratops