If I was a backstabber, you would have been dead already, without me having anything to do with it in the first place, listen, we cannot change the world, those that control the media, control the world. And our role was the opposite, we wanted people to find their individual selves and put their talents for use for themselves and us, today the media tells people who they are, what they like, and what to eat and wear. None of us can do this, point zero is gone, its simply a matter of time, but if you want to try, I can do what I can, in hopes of delaying the inevitable.

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What do you call two men kissing? Gay.

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Women don't need an education. The only book they need is a recipe book.

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What did the bank teller say to Santa Claus? May I help you?

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What's better than seeing a Detroit Lions game? Not being in Detroit.

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What can you use a broken watch for? A compass.

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Roses are yellow, violets are grey, I'm colorblind

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What did the white teen say to the black man? Sup nigga. What then followed? A savage beating at which the teen did not survive.

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Why is Stevie Wonder always so happy? Probably becuase he's a highly succesfull multi-million dollor recording artist with 26 grammys and 1 oscar

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Why did the boy with cancer cross the road? He was hoping to get hit by a truck.

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Omar the Magnificent is performing a huge magic show at a theater in New York City. His final trick will be to have his assistant saw him in half in front of the sold out crowd. Omar never knew how other magicians perform the trick. The crowd of hundreds watches Omar's assistant brutally murder him onstage and many require mental therapy for years to come.

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How did the man want his hair cut? In silence.

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What is a six letter word for cactus? Cactus

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Your dad is so gay that he payed for a male prostitute to have sex and now your family is in ruins.

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What happen's when you give an alcoholic whiskey? He's an alcoholic, so he drinks it.

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What happens when you go swimming in the rain? You get wet.

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Why was six afraid of seven? Because seven raped and murdered eight's family.

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Why did the kid throw a clock out the window? The kid was probably having a temper tantrum and it was an expression of frustration.

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Yo mamma's so fat, that she weighs alot.

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What starts with N, ends with R, and is a black guy? NeighboR!

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What do a software designer, a civil engineer, an airline pilot, and a long-distance swimmer's support team have in common? All of them use angles and trigonometric ratios to help solve problems.

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Why did the monkey fall out of the tree? Because it was dead.

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Why didn't the sperm cell cross the road? It died from the intense heat.

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What is the difference between a seal and an armadillo? They are both aquatic animals, except for the armadillo.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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