Me: Hey mom Mom: Hey Son Me: Whats? for dinner? Mom: I dont know

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See what I did here? ;) Ladies, I just need some space okay? Damn Space Invaders... Ijustmetthespaceinvaderstheytookmyspace << DOUBLE MEANING!

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How do u kill a horse? U stab it with a huge butcher knife

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A man walks into a doctors office He has AIDS

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What do you call people who play dance dance revolution? Dancers

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Did you fall from heaven? Because you look like Satan.

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Why did the girl fall of her bike? Because she got hit by a fridge!

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Rock a by baby, In a tree top When the wind blows The cradle will rock, When the bough breaks The cradle will fall And down will come baby Dying on impact.

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What is a Will And Dan put together A WillDan HAHAHAHAHA

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Knock Knock Who's there? (Pause) Who's there? Hello? Bloody kids

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A blonde, brunette, and redhead find a cliff that is supposed to turn you into something which you exclaim upon leaping from the cliff. The brunette jumps off and exclaims: BIRD! She thus falls to her death on a ton of pointy rocks. The other two loot her corpse and walk away.

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How old are you? 7

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Why did the monkey fall out of the tree? Because the monkey has a very weak cerrebellum.

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Why did the first koala fall off the tree? He was dead. Why did the second koala fall off the tree? He got hit by the first one. Why did the third koala fall off the tree? He thought it was a game so he joined in.

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What did the boy with no arms and no legs get for christmas? A watch and a pair of socks.

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A blonde, brunette, brown walk into a hair salon. They then proceed to each get they're own procedures done then leave not having any contact with each other.

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There is two guys named tard and retard on a boat in shallow water. they both fall off. Who gets back up onto the boat? - Obviously Tard because ur dealing with a retard here.

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Everyone was standing in a bank happily Three muslims walk in Everyone continues their everyday lives coz we live in a non racist society and nothing could go wrong Then the building blew up

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A man walks into a bar, and the bartender asks "What'll you have?" The man replies "Surprise me." The bartender proceeds to mix cyanide with the mans drink and loses his bartending license and goes to prison for murdering a customer.

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A man walked into a bar, he was meeting his friends but was half an hour early, so he went down the road and got a burger. He had recently began dieting to maintain a healthy weight, but had trouble with self control. 20 years later he would gamble away his life savings and then go onto live a lonely and unfulfilled life.

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What do you get when you cross a leopard and Chuck Norris? I don't know. Probably something like a furry yellow Chuck Norris with black spots and sharp teeth.

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So a little girl walked into a bar... A concerned adult then told the bartender. The bartender's name was Jim. Jim then asked the girl if she knew her phone number. The little girl said nothing and the bar tender was perplexed at the petrified look on the girls face. Jim the bartender then called the police and explained the situation.Once the girl was brought back to the police station it was learned that she had been missing for three months in a nearby county. The police then return to the bar to find that the owner had multiple kidnapped little girls in a cage under the bar that only he and the kidnapped girls knew about before the cops and Jim the bartender discovered it. The police then arrested The owner of the bar. He stood trial and was senteced to death row, he remains there today.

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Q) What do you call a black president? A) Mr. President

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

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