What did the farmer say when he finally found his tractor? "Wheres my tractor?" Oh ya he had alzheimers.

What did the African say to the Mexican? "Hola, Como estas?" and the Mexican did not respond because he didn't speak Spanish.

How did the man die? A gorilla raped him

What do you get when you hit a kid with a hockeystick? arrested.

Why was the iPhone screen cracked? Because it was dropped on a rock.

What did Little Jimmie say to his mom when he got home frome school? Nothing his moms dead.

A white guy, a mexican, and a black guy are in a race. Who always wins? Whichever one crosses the finish line first

A black person went into a store and paid full price for his tv

What do you get if you cross a man and a horse? Severe internal bleeding.

Why did the Grandad teabag his Grandson? Because he likes dipping his balls into the mouths of his Grandchildren; as if they were a teabag and his mouth was a mug.

A man asks his wife to make him a sandwich, she proceeds to make a sandwich using rye bread, lettuce, two slices of tomatoes, a variety condiments, mustard and several slices of American cheese. The man eats the sandwich at a parade with his wife celebrating Woman's Rights.

Roses are red, vilotes are blue Erics a dick and Chase is too.

When I was in 4th grade, I was fat. The other kids would take my lunch and spit in all the food, then give it back. Teachers started to wonder why I wasn't eating, and soon began to ask me if I was anorexic. I replied, "do I look anorexic!?" I'm now 6 foot 3 and weigh 56 pounds. *FUN FACT: based on a heartwarming true story.

What do chicken and babies have in common? They both taste like chicken.

Bible Fact0idz: "Something Drink my blood and consume my flesh and live forever something" Jesus- dead age 30something alcoholism liver problems and diabeetus at time of death, crucified and not been seen since, return pending? Classified Alcoholic. Moral: "YOU CANT HANDLE THE TRUTH!"

What's red and green and goes 100mph? A frog in a vehicle on the Autobahn.

Q: why are you gay A: because your physically attracted to the same sex

Did I invite you to my birthday party? No. Then why are you at my birthday party?

what do ninjas and gay people have in common... if you eat them they will no longer be alive

What happens when a black guy roles over a speed-bump? I don't know. I have never tried it

Mr. Wonder, optimism is seeing the glass as half full, pessimism as seeing the glass half empty, and realism as not seeing the glass at all.

What would Jesus do? Something worthy of having him nailed to a cross.

Q. How many babies does it take to paint a room? A. Depends on how hard you throw them.

What do you call the fear of anteaters? Stupid.

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

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